Today, I finally scored a goal in a soccer game. Too bad it was in our own net. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I had a soccer game. A player from the other team hit me in the face. In the next half, she was the goalie and I was determined to score on her. When I finally got my chance to, everyone cheered, until I kicked the ball into the goal post and it bounced back and hit me in the face. FML
Today, during a soccer game, some utter moron got the bright idea of trying to score a goal from his side of the field. I sarcastically made a big show of just barely stopping the ball, and nailed it off to the side. The ball hit a kid so hard in the head that he had to go to the hospital. FML
Today, I was practicing soccer at my school. My team was practicing penalty kicks. It was my turn up and this cute girl that I like was watching off ten feet away from the goal. I was running to take the kick when I slipped and kicked the ball. It hit her head and now she won't talk to me. FML
Today, I was playing one on one soccer with a girl like. I accidentally kicked the ball right into her face. The ball rolled back towards me and as I was running to see if she was ok, I kicked the ball… right into her face again. FML
Today, I got kicked in the face at a soccer game. Everybody clapped. FML
Today, at a soccer game held by my girlfriend's family, some idiot went to kick the ball, missed by a mile, and hit the ground hard. So I started a slow, sarcastic clap. I got a load of angry looks, followed by verbal abuse when we found out he'd split his head open on the ground. FML
Today, I went to my son's school soccer game. Unfortunately, I couldn't get excited about it because my idiot son kept diving the moment anyone so much as breathed on him. It eventually earned him a penalty shot that won him the game. I was so ashamed, I snuck out to avoid being seen with him. FML
Today, I was having a really vivid dream in which I had to take a penalty kick to win the World Cup for the USA. I took the kick, but in reality, I smashed my foot against my bedroom wall and broke four of my toes. I also missed the kick in my dream. FML
Today, I was kicking my soccer ball with my father. My mom pulled out in the car without checking and ran into to me. FML
Today, a soccer ball hit my car while I was going 75 mph on the freeway during my drive home. I still don't know how to explain it. FML
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Top comments
MOLLMcAWESOME 11
When I made my first basket it was in the other teams basket. I was so embarrassed I cried. The refs gave them a point for it. That was the one point they beat us by...
darwinism 30
Heads up OP. A goal is a goal! While you sit on the bench for the next few games you can see how it should be done. Just tell your coach you were trying to confuse the other team by working your way from the back up. Good luck.
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Comments (56)
LyraAlluse 25
Better luck next time OP.
Wealthyparrot 9
You should join the other team.
Zebediabolical 45
I spent two hours trying to do this on purpose in EA FIFA2012. And failed. Blame your goalie, OP.
TheWorldGreatest 8
Lol crap happens!
Ducreaux 7
YDI for playing soccer at all
Patriots21 14
YDI for playing soccer past the age of 7
tj4234 36
For god's sake, it's called football not soccer > . >. Your country speaks English as its official language, same as the country who made it popular. You could at least use the same name. Lol.
RedPillSucks 33
You do realize that North America has another sport that they call "football", right? Ok, so they use their hands to throw or carry the ball, and hardly ever kick the ball, but it's FOOTBALL, damn it! ;-/
Zebediabolical 45
You do realize that America doesn't have an official language, right? And that what we speak is referred to by linguists as 'American English' because it's differed enough over the years to become it's own dialect. The Brits speak 'British English' by way of comparison. When the Cambridge University Press estimates that approximately 2/3's of the native speakers in the world are from America, it stops being your language and becomes a common one in my opinion. Kinda like Cheddar Cheese used to only come from a specific town or county in England. Now it's made in dozens if not scores of countries.
TVKill3r 15
Different area, different language, go eat a ham.
TogeBara 12
For god's sake, this is the United States, and we have another sport we call football. You want us to call it something we've already got. It isn't going to happen and our sport isn't going away, so don't bother. On top of that we do NOT have an official language. Our country MOSTLY speaks English, but no, we do not have an official language. The reason we don't is political, the higher ups like that our country is a cultural melting pot and wish to keep it that way. This leads them to not name an official language. I wish we had an official language so I could tell off anyone that couldn't speak English. Its so frustrating to have someone come here, and then tell us how to talk or speak. Telling us that WE should learn Spanish, French, or Italian. Hey, I got an idea, if you are speaking with someone from a foreign country (while in said country) how about you try to learn their mannerisms and speak their language? I don't even like football nor do I like YOUR football. Just thought I'd point out that you were being massively rude by trying to correct something that needn't be corrected.
RedPillSucks 33
I agree with you up to the bottom of the paragraph. Americans are famous for going to other countries and assuming that everyone speaks english. We tend not to bother learning another language, so we can't be too pissed off when people go to America and don't speak english right away.
tj4234 36
You didn't 'already have your own football'. Football comes from the medieval period, and was made popular throughout the world by the British Empire. Meaning it came over to America when America was part of the British Empire. Whereas the first American Football game was in 1869. Which was after America was ceded from the Empire.
Maren61 10
Better luck next time:)
Jordano4444 7
my first basket in basketball was in the other teams net. the whole game stopped, everyone stared at me and they counted the point. i was crying and my coach was like "what's wrong?"
an3ph 20
No worries. There are more important things in life. I once made a goal with my face.