Today, I woke up in the middle of the night to go to the bathroom. I was there with the lights out when something ran across my foot. I freaked out, tried to kick it off, and ended up smashing my foot into the side of the tub. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, at work, I used my foot to flush the toilet, lost my balance, and ended up catching myself with my foot in the toilet. FML
Today, I woke up so hungover that when I went to the bathroom and caught sight of myself in the mirror, I screamed, slipped backwards, and smashed my head against the rim of my bathtub. FML
Today, in the middle of the night, I got up to go get some water. When I came back, I was going to flop onto my bed, but I faceplanted into my floor. I'd forgotten that I'd rearranged my room and moved my bed. FML
Today, I had a dream I was going the bathroom. I then woke up peeing, but I didn’t wet the bed yet. As I ran to the bathroom while half asleep and in the dark, I rammed into the wall. On my way back to bed, I tripped and accidentally slapped my fiancé in an effort to stop myself from falling over. FML
Today, as I got up from the couch, my computer, which was next to me, fell on to my pinky toe. It fell just so that the edge of it cut my toe open. I cursed, and hobbled toward the bathroom to get a bandage. As I'm going into the bathroom, I stub said toe on the door jamb. FML
Today, while taking a shower, a spider fell from the ceiling onto my foot. I took down my shower head to wash it down the drain, and in the process, got soap in my eye and rammed my head into the wall. FML
Today, while sleeping, my foot was stabbed by something in my bed and I woke up to it bleeding. I looked around for the cause and found nothing. Now I'm afraid to go to sleep because it might happen again. FML
Today, I decided to conquer my fear of blades, and tried shaving my legs with a razor. I sat on the side of my bathtub and wet my legs, but some of the water splashed. I slipped on it and fell back, hitting my head on the tile wall and slicing my leg open at the same time. FML
Today, I got home late after a long day at work and all I wanted to do was take a shower and go to bed. As soon as the water in the shower was hot, I got in. One minute, I was standing and the next I was fast asleep at the bottom of the tub. I woke up with my face swollen and my shoulder bruised. FML
Today, as I tried to get out of bed, I got my foot tangled in my sheets. I reached out to my dresser to avoid falling flat on my face. I didn't fall, but I did manage to smash my fingers in the drawer while still trapped in the sheets. FML
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Top comments
Cyrus00 41
Now there's the question of do you want to know what it was?
THEDUDE1553566 24
Hope it's not broken or injured in anyway. Feel better op
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Comments (61)
bella_nana347 23
I'd definitely check for mice, or worse, rats. Both are an actual possibility in most homes
messymessiah 11
Did you find out what it was? I wouldn't be able to sleep the rest of the night if I didn't know what it was. Hope your foot isn't too badly damaged
born_hustla 26
Why was the light off?
JuzReading 23
Now your tub has a nice print of your foot :)
Khaleesi_D 9
That happened to me once when i was half awake. I managed to rip my favorite pajama pants and break the toilet seat jumping onto it. The worst part is there was nothing there.
sammiaaron 16
this gave me the chills
obake_neechan 14
Hawai'i too? Sounds like a cockroach.
momac86 17
That's why I always keep a night light in the bath and bedroom so if I need to wake up I can see what's going on
jocamo 24
same here. enough light to see but no blindness when it's first turned on
moo77_fml 20
What was it??
snarkytruth 37
Probably just a gecko or a mouse maybe one of those giant roaches. Paradise comes with a price.
cameronraygun 11
did you ever find out what it was