Today, I was eating cereal and decided to warm it up to see what it tasted like. So, using a candle in the room I placed my spoon over the flame and waited to see if it heated up. Pleased with my silly experiment, I put the spoon back in my mouth. I now can't talk because of my swollen tongue. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I decided to have cereal for breakfast. I poured the cereal in the bowl, added the milk and had a spoonful. Then I realized that my cereal was moving in the back of my mouth. FML
Today, I popped something straight out of the oven into my mouth. It burned my tongue instantly, but instead of spitting it out, I swallowed. I felt it burning all the way down. Now I can’t eat solid food or drink hot drinks. FML
Today, I tried to warm soup in a travel mug. I forgot to take the metal spoon out. The microwave lit up like a firework display, and I screamed so loudly that my neighbor knocked on my door to check if I was alive. FML
Today, I burned my nose. How? I tried sniffing a lit candle. FML
Today, I made a cup of tea at work. Whilst talking to a workmate, I took a sip of the tea, which I had forgotten was boiling hot, and laughed at the same time, causing it to come out of my nose. I have blistered my whole mouth and even burnt my nostrils. FML
Today, as I was trying to remove my lunch from the hot oven tray, my finger brushed against the metal for a moment, and I instinctively put it in my mouth. I burnt my tongue, on my finger. I didn't realize that was possible. FML
Today, I was using the same metal spoon to stir boiling noodles and the pasta sauce I was heating up. I decided to taste the sauce and see if it was getting warm, forgetting that the spoon was sitting in boiling water three seconds earlier. FML
Today, I was eating my lunch. When I opened my mouth to eat a spoonful of rice, a bee flew right inside my mouth. My tongue got stung. FML
Today, I woke up after putting my child to bed. Drowsy, I stumbled down to the kitchen to make a mug cookie. I read a recipe on my phone, and put a knob of butter in a cup to melt in the microwave. I put my phone in the microwave and turned it on for 30 seconds, and didn't realize what I'd done until I smelt burning plastic. FML
Today, I burned my tongue. With a flat iron. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
RyanRaygun 0
Not to mention your heroin habit.
chakrabs 0
What are you, an idiot? Why wouldnt you use a microwave? I use it all the time with my cereal, its too cold sometimes and hurts my teeth. 10 seconds in the nuker is usually enough.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (411)
chupacabra_fml 0
wait...did you think the cereal would get hot, but the spoon wouldn't??? Why is common sense...not common? YDI for sure
thelonelylurker 0
These are not FMLs, you dumb kids.
fatality2009 0
Ok... Dude you can try do the same thing in your balls and tellme what are the results if youre still alive ok? :P
24788 7
Sounds like you were trying drugs instead of cereal. :P
Mav_fml 0
Microwaves **** themselves backwards if you leave metal in them. :B
Cerataphora 0
Chemistry FTW To all the people who complain about how "FMLS SUCK SO BAdZZORZ LATELY!!!!", nobody is making you come here...
KawaiiRoxas 0
...stupid. XD
kronk45 0
duh
Lauriebug 0
to the person/people questioning candle own-age: I assume in your head, you're imagining a stick candle that needs a holder that you walk around with to light your way at night while wearing a pajama coat. but actually many females (and even males) have at least one scented candle somewhere in their house. I alone have 5 in my room right now.
may_cause_fail 0
27- I lol'd. :D I'm YDI on this one. I can't believe you've never made the connection that heat+metal+body=ow! before. >>