Today, I decided to smoke a cigarette while I was driving to work. I was also eating french fries during the drive. I had never realized how much a cigarette feels like a french fry. In conclusion, cigarettes don't taste very good when you bite into them. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was holding a lit cigarette in one hand and a lollipop in the other. Guess which one I licked? FML
Today, I quit smoking cigarettes. While driving to work, the car in front of me flicked his out the window, flying straight into mine. It set the bottom of my seat on fire. FML
Today, I pretended to smoke a bread stick that looked like a cigar. It made me feel cool. FML
Today, I decided to quit smoking. During my lunch break, I tried to ash the KitKat bar that was in my hand after I took a bite. FML
Today, after months of avoiding fast food, I decided to eat some McDonald's french fries. Though the fries were delicious, they were not worth the agonizing 15 minutes I spent on the toilet afterwards. FML
Today, I kissed my girlfriend and she tasted like a cigarette. I don't smoke. She doesn't smoke. My roommate does. FML
Today, I made the decision to quit smoking while I was driving in my car. So I took my pack, crushed it and threw it out the window. I felt triumphant about this change I was making in my life, until the cop I didn't know was behind me gave me a ticket for littering. FML
Today, while driving me to the hospital because I was having an asthma attack, my mother lit a cigarette. FML
Today, I was driving with my mom. She had some soda with her from earlier, and even though it was probably warm, I was thirsty. I ask for a sip, she hands it to me and says sure. And I get a mouthful of ash-and-cigarette-butt-filled soda. Apparently she didn't feel the need to mention this to me. FML
Today, I was smoking a cigarette while watching the meteor shower. I was just about at the filter and as I was taking my last drag, my friend decided to scare me from behind, and I accidentally sucked the whole thing in my mouth. They don't go out immediately when in your mouth. My tongue hurts. FML
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Top comments
keke_fml 0
let's see which one kills you first
Charlesdenfreude 0
Wow, that's like the healthiest activity I've ever heard of
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Comments (208)
VLLYBLLKAY 0
wow, seriously? sliced and fried potatoes do not feel the same as cigarettes.
truelyawesome 0
here's the simple way to fix it: don't smoke
bobmandude 0
Lol! The in conclusion part is hilarious! But still, FYL
motoxracer156 5
YDI for smoking
THEsuperMANLYman 10
Op, you deserve it for slowly killing yourself
Charlesdenfreude 0
Wow, that's like the healthiest activity I've ever heard of
keke_fml 0
let's see which one kills you first
111615 0
ya totally agree
Shaebug12 0
That made me laugh!!! lmao but yea that's what u get for smokin so yea
Coder17 0
Agreed^^
cutiepie343 7
10 bucks on the cigarettes.
Mlikescatz 6
True dat
Whytetrash 21
Probably the driving while using both hands to eat and smoke.
LMAOking123 15
I bet its French fries XD
shitidied 17
70 bucks on clogged arteries
amoureaux 0
hmm i would've thought it would taste good, what with all the chemicals and crap in them. anyways, you smoke them, so might as well eat them too!!
YourImaginaryFri 0
well no because there is enough nicotine in one cigaret that if you eat it, your dead within 6-12 hours.
truthbetoldxoxo 0
not true! my friend ate one for a dare and he is very much alive and well. wherever you got your facts from is terribly mistaken!!
ptrek85 0
If you add salt and deep-fry them cigarettes taste pretty good. But then you would have to smoke your french fries.......
AkeemKN 1
Yummy.
blankslate 0
lame. You smoke them...so you accidently bit into one...who cares?
MaiLouIsLegend 0
Hahah how'd you like that? Tobaccotastic! Shouldn't mix eating and smoking together= fail.
Coder17 0
Shouldn't smoke....
Jammin_44 0
seriously, who eats and smokes at the same time?
sLap_fml 0
gross. that's what you get for smoking cancer and consuming disgusting fast food.