Today, it's my birthday. All I wanted was birthday sex, but all my boyfriend could talk about was how great the new purse he got me was. I think he might like it more than me. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, it was my birthday. My boyfriend had promised that the day would belong to me. But no, I had to drive 80km forth and back to pick him up from work, then he took pictures with his new camera lens, then he decided what to eat, demanded a massage, and then he just fell asleep. Happy birthday to me. FML
Today, the only thing I got for my birthday was my boyfriend's offer to give me "the gift of anal". FML
Today, it's my birthday. I don't mind crappy gifts, but I have to wonder why the hell my boyfriend bought me a home enema kit. FML
Today, it was my birthday. My boyfriend made me breakfast in bed, then we went out shopping, had a picnic, watched a good romcom, had a fancy dinner, and ended the day with great sex. And when the clock struck twelve, he dumped me. FML
Today, for my birthday, my boyfriend presented me with his cock with a ribbon on it. Basically, HE wanted sex for MY birthday and had the nerve to accuse me of being ungrateful. For his birthday last month, I gave him multiple Xbox games. He couldn’t even be bothered to get me flowers. FML
Today, it's my birthday. I told my boyfriend I wanted to feel special even if for just one day. He said he would do the laundry for me. FML
Today, as it's my birthday, I was hoping for a nice present from my boyfriend. What did he get me? A PornHub account. FML
Today, it's the day after my birthday. My boyfriend got me nothing. Nor did he do anything for me for Valentine's Day. Whereas I got him an $85 game for his birthday, planned a surprise visit to his family so he could see them and his pets, and spent all day Valentine's Day making the house spotless, as well as cakes. FML
Today, it's my birthday. My boyfriend’s birthday is a month before mine. I'd spent my birthday savings on his, but he told me that we couldn’t do anything for mine because, “I didn’t plan or organize better.” FML
Today, rather than get me a birthday present, my boyfriend just got angry that I got gifts from other people. Apparently, it "made him feel guilty." FML
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Top comments
HeyMondayAddict 4
Maybe he just feels really good about getting you something.
UnikornG33K 12
Aw that sucks, but at least he got you something, right?
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Comments (175)
sirsquab 12
Doesn't matter, had... wait.
klovemachine 24
Awesome :)
meggieeee51 9
Use the purse to seduce him then. If sex is what you're after, find a way to make it happen with what he is interested in... Even if it is a purse?
AugustBurnsToast 14
Haha and maybe then she can fulfill some of his purse fetish fantasies.
Jaxx66 21
Get in a skimpy outfit with the purse on your shoulder, and make it happen! Or lose all clothes and try. :3
LolCakes111 7
Nice. The girlfriend doesnt want sex, understandable. The boyfriend doesn't want sex, he's gay. If the situation was reversed, everyone would probably saying YDI for the boyfriend being a horny dog. Double Standards -,-
GigaPudding_fml 24
It's also funny how the guy is excused/cute for getting her something, had it been the other way around no one would have thought about it since it's understood that girls give presents.
SqueakyChipmunk 22
Maybe he's trying to surprise her. "This purse is awesome, aren't you glad i bought it for-- SURPRISE BUTT SECKS!!!!
DoubleCross 9
This is usually completely reversed. Just turn him in somehow.
jizzwold 21
To the police? All he wanted was to make op happy!
Keevarou 17
And guys? This is why we can't have nice things..
CharliesCool2084 8
Just take his top off.
yahoowizard 16
Or yours (OPs, not 19 (although either works))
RedPillSucks 33
I hope that's not her O face...
CharliesCool2084 8
116 - The person in the picture isn't me...
Killuhk 8
Omg! I love Jenna Marbles :) ha
06dopey 8
at least he got you a purse. you can have sex anytime. don't you think you might be being at least a lil unappreciative?
Enslaved 38
You sound ungrateful. It seems like he tried to get you something for your birthday that he thought was a great gift. I'm all for birthday sex but you can have great sex any time of the year.
jajaflan 4
Check if he is hiding in the closet
sexygurllolz 1
He's proud that he got you something that was probably pretty expensive, so stop bitchin.
PrincessPesa 20
It's great that her boyfriend got her something he's proud of and hopefully she was gracious when he gave it to her. But is the point of giving a gift the gratification you feel for buying someone something expensive? I hope not. Gifts aren't given for the giver's sake.
06dopey 8
the fact that OP got on FML to bitch about getting a gift makes me lose all hope for mankind. there is no gratefulness or gratitude, for anything/anyone, left in the world
jizzwold 21
The fact that 44 is getting thumbed down is kind of depressing.