Today, I found out that I made inappropriate sexual comments to my boss while I was drunk on Saturday night. She won't tell me what I said. She just laughs when she sees me. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my boss mistakenly drunk-texted me and was talking shit about me. FML
Today, I found out that I drunkenly texted my boss yesterday asking for nude pictures. He sent them. I'm afraid to go to work tomorrow. FML
Today, I drunkenly made out with my 65 year-old married female boss. I'm a 21 year-old male intern. I have a feeling work will be awkward tomorrow. FML
Today, I overheard my boss talking about me on the phone. Turns out he was drunk off his ass when he gave the go-ahead to hire me, and he's now searching for any excuse to legally fire me. FML
Today, I found out there's a rumor going around that my smoking hot co-worker and I had sex over the weekend. I'm not nearly as pissed off about the rumor as I am by the fact that I can't remember it because I was too drunk. FML
Today, my friend and I got really drunk at the holiday staff party. When I went to work afterwards, everyone gave me the death stare. Apparently, I got so drunk that I flashed my boss's 13-year-old son. FML
Today, my boss wrote me up for saying "pissed" in front of a client. This is the same boss who nearly pissed himself laughing when a client made an extremely off-color Holocaust joke a few weeks ago, in front of half the department. FML
Today, my boss fired me because of the way I laugh. Apparently it reminds him too much of his ex-wife's laugh. I'm a guy. FML
Today, while we were at a work party, I noticed a drunk lady in the mix. I pointed out to my boss how dumb she looked. It was his daughter. FML
Today, I confessed my feelings to the girl I like, who also happens to be my coworker. She told my boss, and they're laughing about it as I type this. FML
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Top comments
icychill67 1
as long as she is not mad it should be all good
Arteaga 0
Hey, I see this as an opportunity to make your way up the latter at your job. Get laid and get on her good side to get you better pay
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Comments (114)
cooldannyboy 0
the comment the OP said to his boss was, " I want to suck on your BIG TOE" so now everytime she sees him she can't keep a straight face. LOL
x805xUnknown 6
People live in Alaska?! Haha, jk!
kinkajoujennie 0
Be happy you still have a job.... Drunk!
Purpose30 0
Is your boss Sarah Palin?!?! ohhh waiiittt, never mind.
oceansoul_fml 0
I clicked ydi as soon aa I read the word 'drunk'.
RaIeigh 0
^ Yeh same here..but i had to keep reading for a laugh that never came .
ckrebbs 0
12 who knows if the boss is hot but I sure as hell know you are. and 15 that really wasn't as funny as you thought it was... op maybe she wants you now haha
Diannaa 0
Just be happy she didn't fire you or press charges.
destonerock 0
if you drink.., then do something and don't remember...booze is prob. not ur friend. think about it. the comments about a women being his boss. what f?;/'n planet are u guys from.. what year do u live in...
FerrariCake 2
If your boss is ugly, you deserve whatever she does to you. You should never drink so much that you lose your memory when you're in the vicinity of ugly chicks. Once those videos make it to the internet, they live forever!
namhowell 6
At least it didn't piss her off.
oogyboogy 6
your right... he pissed ON her.