Today, I was having passionate sex with my girlfriend of nine months. She was making a lot of noise, so I told her to keep it down, and reminded her that my parents and sister downstairs. A few minutes later, I got a text from my sister, saying my parents wanted to make sure I was wearing a condom. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was having sex with a girl. She was really into it and not holding back on the noise...That is, until I received a text message from my little sister next door reading "If she is making that much noise, she is probably faking it...Trust me, I know." FML
Today, while making love to my boyfriend, my sister called my cell phone. Not wanting to face the consequences of not answering, I had a long conversation with her. My boyfriend kept going. FML
Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend of nine months when she gets a phone call and decides to answer it. It was her fiancé that I knew nothing about. She told me she was engaged while I was still inside of her. FML
Today, my mom came into my bedroom and told me to "Listen to this voicemail." I listened to me and my girlfriend talking dirty, followed by the bed springs bouncing for three minutes. I had my phone in the pocket while I was having sex with her and it left my mom a nice voicemail. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I came back to my house after a night on the town. Thinking the house was empty, we had sex. Just as it was getting good, my phone beeped. It was a text from my mom, saying, "Quiet down. Even your father can tell you're faking." FML
Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend. My phone started ringing and it was my Mom, she said I could answer it. As I answered the phone my girlfriend started playing with my dick. I moaned. Loud. FML
Today, my girlfriend were having sex. When I finished, she whispered in my ear, "30 seconds." FML
Today, I got permission from my parents for my boyfriend to stay over. Things got intimate, and I tried my hardest not to make too much noise. However, while having a post-sex cuddle, we heard my parents in the next room muttering about my "faking". FML
Today, during sex I wasn’t really into it so I was letting my mind wander and it randomly settled on my sister's birthday and how I needed to buy a gift. As my husband seemed like he was about to finish, I faked my orgasm and accidentally moaned my sister's name. He heard me, so now he’s "concerned". FML
Today, while having sex with my boyfriend, I was apparently really loud, because when we finished I heard his mom and grandma sarcastically imitating me outside. FML
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Top comments
VonHoolio 1
How is this an fml? At least they didn't care. Just making sure you were safe.
FortuneFaded 0
Haha, awkward.
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Comments (91)
me5 0
Yes. There's a similar one. Almost identical
tyrob911 0
read this before. anyway, how is this an fml? your parents actually care for you by trying to make sure you're using a condom. they know you ain't ready for kids you fool. next time u don't tell your girl to keep it down, you tell her "shut up bitch." works everytime but also means u won't get laid for about 3 weeks
HeatSeeker 0
i like my basement; parents wouldnt hear a word.
eleni_fml 0
Ouch :)
drgnsf8 0
hahaha. they have the right idea. you should think about whether you want to be taking care of child at your age. my guess is no.
amberbby69 6
No glove, no love.
misha1995 0
+1 Awesome points
DThorn 3
You have leveled up from N00b to Accepted User
brodyjenner 0
*alot.
sweetbiotch88 0
uhm awkward much? Lmfao
why_me725 0
Well, were you?
ellawea 0
awkward.