Today, I had to climb up and sit in a tree for half an hour to avoid being mauled by a huge, insane dog. Its weird-looking owner eventually turned up, sneered at me, and walked off with the visibly smug dog in tow. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I took a peaceful walk through the park, and then sat on the grass. As I was enjoying the quiet, a dog appeared out of nowhere and decided my shoes were a chew toy. I spent 10 minutes trying to wrestle my shoes away from this dog, while its owner casually walked in the opposite direction. FML
Today, I was walking in the park with my girlfriend, when out of nowhere, I was savaged and brutally humped into submission by a massive Great Dane. Not only did my girlfriend watch it all, but the dog's owner took the time to snap a few pictures with his phone. Neither bothered to help me. FML
Today, my dog was about to get hit by a tree branch, so I yelled for him to move. He got mad and started barking at me. And got nailed by the tree branch. FML
Today, I was walking my dog when he decided that he was too lazy to continue walking. It ended up with me looking like a crazy dog lady carrying my medium-sized dog home. FML
Today, knowing very well that I need to be more active, I went for a walk. It quickly turned into a sprint when I was attacked and chased by a dog. FML
Today, I was mauled by my own dog. I own a Chihuahua. FML
Today, a dog attacked me. Its owner, instead of apologizing and helping me, said it was my own fault for making it think I was an attacker by running past them. We were on a jogging track. FML
Today, I took my dog for a walk. He became friendly with another dog, and I reached down to pet them both. Suddenly, an old woman ran up to me and whacked me with her cane repeatedly. Apparently, her previous dog had been kidnapped by a woman who looked a lot like me. FML
Today, I went for a run, and my own dog attacked me. FML
Today, I saw a dog trying to attack a man. I have experience working with aggressive dogs, so I pulled the dog off him and got it under control. The man punched me in the face for not having my dog on a leash. It wasn't my dog. I don't even own a dog. FML
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Top comments
Gloritank 8
Were you pissin on his territory?
tylersign 11
Should have gotten off his damn lawn. Kids and their shenanigans these days.
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Comments (121)
The__Redneck 7
That's when you call the police and have it put down. If he refuses to control his dog, he doesn't deserve to have it. And unless you were breaking in or something, a dog that attacks people is a dog that needs a bullet.
BananEnigma 24
More like its owner needs a bullet.
RomoniReed 6
My neighbor learned the hard way about keeping her vicious dogs locked up. After complaining to her about her dogs coming in MY yard, growling & trying to bite me. I shot both of them when they started to attack me. I didn't kill them but she keeps them on a chain now.
princess3355 0
**** your life
scottgeo 0
My neighbor carried a golf club when he walked cause of one of our other neighbors dog. That is till my friend ran that damn dog over with his truck...twice.
tona01 16
I really don't think that killing the dog is the answer. My dog wad agressive, until se sent him to live for a month to a special farmacéutica for dogs, kind of a dog hotel of sorts. He returned the best dog of the world
hateevryone 15
dude fyl for real. i know how you feel cause i cant stand dogs. i hate hate it even more when they have ignorant owners.
shnipe 4
Glad to see you my neighbor (:
alepintchap 0
Press V to grab its throat
zombiekitten87 12
The DOG was visibly smug? Dude. It's a dog. It doesn't do "smug."
herbrightskies 9
They can. They can smile. A very creepy smile right enough, but a smile nonetheless.
speerman91 3
Or maybe you're a pansy? hmmmmmmm?
CloverFuchs 6
Or maybe you're an idiot? Hmm.