Today, in the middle of sex, my boyfriend sighed, said, "I can't do this any more" and pulled out. After repeatedly asking him what was wrong, he basically told me that I suck in bed. Apparently, the way I "just lie there" makes him feel like a necrophile. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, as my girlfriend and I were making love, and she started to moan and groan. All of a sudden, she stopped and said, "I'm lying, you suck at this." FML
Today, I asked my boyfriend why we never have sex anymore. He said, "Honestly, you lie there with your arms balled up against your chest, you don't moan or give any indication that you're enjoying things. It makes me really uncomfortable." FML
Today, my boyfriend told me that he’s no longer interested in sex with me, as he just can't be bothered. FML
Today, my boyfriend told me he doesn't like having sex with me, because I get too wet and it makes him go limp. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex, when he finished, seemingly angry. He stood there naked complaining for 15 minutes about how our sex sucked. Then he demanded that I dress him, because "it's my fault his clothes were off in the first place". FML
Today, the guy I have been seeing stopped me in the middle of sex and told me to finish him off by going down on him instead. After a few minutes, I looked up to discover that the noises I had thought were moans of pleasure were actually the sounds of him snoring. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex, and after 10 seconds he gave up and said "This is more tiring than I expected". FML
Today, after laying down to sleep, my boyfriend seemed like he was having trouble trying to say something. After asking what was wrong a couple of times, he said, "I don't want to do this anymore" and got up and left. I had planned on telling him I love him. Saved myself some embarrassment I guess. FML
Today, my boyfriend told me he’d rather masturbate than have sex with me, and that sex with me is a chore. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I had sex for the second time. He's really nice, but he's terrible in bed. He busted a nut 3 times before I could orgasm once, and he can't finger to make up for it. His foreplay is trash. I'm starting to lose feelings for him because of the lack of sexual satisfaction. FML
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Top comments
DocBastard 40
I swear to the Mighty FML Deity, everyone who says "Dump him" gets my foot up their asses. What he did is called "communication" and it's vital to a relationship, especially when it comes to sex. I applaud him for actually having the balls to tell you. How else are you going to learn to stop acting like a corpse during sex?
eternalsunlight 5
So try a new position. Cowgirl should do the trick.
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Comments (201)
bach2121 13
Put some passion into it! Everyone HATES dead fish syndrome.
lacespace 8
Sushi syndrome
stfuNOWplease 6
Play with yourself while you're on top. Wont just be a corpse then!
darkangel752 2
Spice things up... There is a world of possibilities out there. Watch some ****, get some books, and for your BFs sake MOVE!
KuchkaNumberOne 2
Well damn. Make an effort and maybe he wouldn't feel that way.
KeenBird 2
I wonder if he read this Fml here today.
missy2420 4
Thats your own fault sweetheart try to at least act like you like it
lonestarfree 1
Why is everyone blaming her? Maybe HE sucks in bed and she doesn't feel anything.
hellya14 0
Because clearly she makes no effort, and sex is a two person fun activity....
outoftown 27
Did you guys miss the touchy-feely, what-feels-good-where part before intercourse? Your boyfriend cares enough about you to talk about it. Talk, explore, play.
cowgirl247 2
Dump his ass.
vitjoey4 14
You're ******* dumb
ozone9914 2
one word. MOAN