Today, in the middle of sex, my boyfriend sighed, said, "I can't do this any more" and pulled out. After repeatedly asking him what was wrong, he basically told me that I suck in bed. Apparently, the way I "just lie there" makes him feel like a necrophile. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, as my girlfriend and I were making love, and she started to moan and groan. All of a sudden, she stopped and said, "I'm lying, you suck at this." FML
Today, I asked my boyfriend why we never have sex anymore. He said, "Honestly, you lie there with your arms balled up against your chest, you don't moan or give any indication that you're enjoying things. It makes me really uncomfortable." FML
Today, my boyfriend told me that he’s no longer interested in sex with me, as he just can't be bothered. FML
Today, my boyfriend told me he doesn't like having sex with me, because I get too wet and it makes him go limp. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex, when he finished, seemingly angry. He stood there naked complaining for 15 minutes about how our sex sucked. Then he demanded that I dress him, because "it's my fault his clothes were off in the first place". FML
Today, the guy I have been seeing stopped me in the middle of sex and told me to finish him off by going down on him instead. After a few minutes, I looked up to discover that the noises I had thought were moans of pleasure were actually the sounds of him snoring. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex, and after 10 seconds he gave up and said "This is more tiring than I expected". FML
Today, after laying down to sleep, my boyfriend seemed like he was having trouble trying to say something. After asking what was wrong a couple of times, he said, "I don't want to do this anymore" and got up and left. I had planned on telling him I love him. Saved myself some embarrassment I guess. FML
Today, my boyfriend told me he’d rather masturbate than have sex with me, and that sex with me is a chore. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I had sex for the second time. He's really nice, but he's terrible in bed. He busted a nut 3 times before I could orgasm once, and he can't finger to make up for it. His foreplay is trash. I'm starting to lose feelings for him because of the lack of sexual satisfaction. FML
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Top comments
DocBastard 40
I swear to the Mighty FML Deity, everyone who says "Dump him" gets my foot up their asses. What he did is called "communication" and it's vital to a relationship, especially when it comes to sex. I applaud him for actually having the balls to tell you. How else are you going to learn to stop acting like a corpse during sex?
eternalsunlight 5
So try a new position. Cowgirl should do the trick.
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Comments (201)
Sai_Run614 7
Damn, you are lucky he gave you a chance to try something different. I would have peaced.
tinkdatank 15
That's kinda your fault.
zyprexa_fml 10
YDI for not doing anything to arouse him in bed, and just making him do everything for you.
alexlovescandy 3
Try something new like doggy style or some crazy shit like that!!
ObeyStudKing 4
Get on top and start riding his dick. That will shut him up. Either that or watch some **** the next time you ****, so you can reenact those positions ;-) .
heartlesstool 7
As a boy, I'll preferably skip it all if things are not pleasing us both. Your (eventual) impish behaviour is highly inciting.
Jinxx7 0
Why would u just be lying there in the first place?
emmyjayyay 7
Seriously darling, not having a go, but you do need to at least be a bit responsive! The occasional moan, meeting his eyes. However it's also uber selfish to just stick with missionary, yeah occasionally if you're knackered it's ok to be a bit of a lazy lover, but have fun! Find some good articles with diagrams if you're not sure. Cowgirl is good, reverse cowgirl is awesome for hitting just the right places.
devon8823 4
Watch **** if you don't know what to do.
cinder2theblock 0
Don't be a dead fish