Today, I had to announce to the whole house that I was going the bathroom, because the lock on the door is broken. Before I had the chance to wipe, my dad loudly burst through the door, stark bollock naked, to take a shower. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my mother told my boyfriend a cute story about me when I was little. The one where my cousin and I were caught pooping in a urinal in the church basement. FML
Today, I realized I can tell which one of my 6 roommates has taken a dump, just based on the smell emanating from the toilet. FML
Today, I was at the mall with my young daughter. I hate pooping in public but I really had to go so I brought her in with me. Thinking we were alone, I started to go and my daughter yelled, "Good job Mommy, you're using the potty like a big girl!" I then heard laughing. FML
Today, I was taking a dump in a porta-potty at a fair. I had the runs really bad. All I have to say is that it's tough to take a shit that seems never-ending while other people outside are bitching at you and hammering on the flimsy door. FML
Today, it's been two weeks since my parents went crazy with their attempts to save on the water bill. Every time I want to take a shower, I have to ask them first. Let's just say I've had to resort to taking sponge baths in public bathrooms to keep my B.O. under control. FML
Today, I was in the toilet. Some idiots thought it was funny to throw a water balloon into the cubicle. The balloon didn't pop, but fell in the toilet, sending my own urine onto my shorts. I had 4 hours left of school. FML
Today, while on a date with my boyfriend, he broke up with me. The reason why? Because I took a dump in his bathroom and "that's inappropriate for girls." FML
Today, I was in a public restroom taking a dump. It's difficult for me to do it in public, so to make it easier I kept telling myself, "Nobody's here, you're all alone." I then heard, "No, you're not." I didn't realize I was saying it out loud, or that I wasn't alone. FML
Today, anticipating another stressful day of work, I left my house with a cluster of thoughts in my mind. It was only when I heard my front door lock behind me, my hand still resting on the handle, that I realised I had forgotten my house keys. FML
Today, I realized that my 3 year-old son, who is being potty trained, has better aim standing up to pee than his 30 year-old father. FML
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Top comments
gideeupp 9
Some things in life you can't un-see. This is one of them.
flockz 20
haha piece of wood? she was already being blinded by one.
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Comments (123)
bankrupt 15
I used to hate that when I lived at home. Everyone was allowed to burst in on me when I was in the bathroom but I had to give everyone else their privacy. When I was first married it would actually startle me when my husband knocked on the bathroom door. No one had ever given me that courtesy before.
ladybrava17 0
wow that is pretty sad!
bobbymullet 11
just curious, why can't you spell things right?
m1k30d 6
Incest party
xXSmilezXX 7
That happens to me all the time but it's usually people iv never seen before
rabbittboi 18
Kinky. I know people who would pay to live where you do...
enonymous 9
If this was reverse where you were in the shower and he rushed in to evacuate that chimichanga that didn't sit too well from the night before.. Then it might be an FML
Thanatos1206 0
Couldn't this problem be solved in the future by the use of an "Occupied" sign??
cupcakesnpot 9
I'm sorry that happened to you, I know first hand that seeing your dad naked is something that you can never unsee!
RyanMacVey 17
good on him... families have seen everything dude... my family got no secrets anymore
enonymous 9
Not just family ;)
RyanMacVey 17
huh?
enonymous 9
Let's just say I've got hungry eyes
taylornicole97 8
lol, you won't be forgetting that anytime soon.
Madiluvsyuh98 2
Did he stare