Today, I had a stomach virus, so I didn't eat anything. My new roommate asked me if I was anorexic so to prove I wasn't, I ate a sandwich in front of her. Only to go into the bathroom and throw it up later. She heard and now thinks I'm bulimic. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I felt sick to my stomach, so I told my mother I didn't want to eat dinner. She started accusing me of being anorexic, so I ate a little bit anyway to make her stop. I then threw up, only for her to take it as confirmation that I have an eating disorder. FML
Today, surprisingly, my roommate made a nice meal. Within an hour, I started throwing up. When I confronted her, she confessed that she'd used long expired ingredients, including meat, because she didn't want the garbage men to think she's "the type that wastes food." FML
Today, I got sick of my flatmate stealing my food so I decided to sabotage a leftover pizza with laxatives. I came back home later in the evening after a night of heavy drinking. Guess what I had to eat in my drunken stupor. FML
Today, after struggling with anorexia for months, I got food poisoning. FML
Today, I worked up the courage to confess my bulimia to my girlfriend of three months. It's a touchy subject for me and I ended up in tears. When I was done talking, I looked up to see my girlfriend's disgusted face. She claimed I had a 'vomit fetish', said I was 'half a man' and broke up with me. FML
Today, I had a stomach virus. I tried to make myself throw up to feel better. My long nails sliced open my throat from the inside, and I threw up blood. FML
Today, I have an awful stomach virus. I can only drink liquids and can't eat anything solid, especially anything spicy. My dad forced me to eat the fajitas he'd made for dinner and screamed at me when I told him I couldn't, then screamed at me again for "wasting food" when I predictably threw up all over the floor. FML
Today, my mother called me a "wasteful child" because I threw up my lunch. FML
Today, I went out to eat to celebrate getting over the stomach flu. I hadn't eaten solid food in over a week, so I was really excited and ordered my favorite dish. It gave me food poisoning. FML
Today, to keep me from "getting fatter", my roommate raided the kitchen. She ate everything from cookies and ice cream to deli meat. The only thing left in the house are vegetables. FML
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Top comments
Ngood7 0
Why didn't you just say you had a stomach virus?
Eir_fml 1
I like the name you posted with.
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Comments (34)
Jaynaynay 3
Who on earth actually tells others they feel ill by saying "Sorry, I have a stomach virus." Nobody would word their response in that fashion, but it makes me laugh how many people suggested that as a legit response.
kurquizu 3
I would say that... What's wrong with it?
SayPeanuts 29
I'd say that too...
effyoubitch 5
Well obviously if they suggested the op say that then why wouldn't they respond in the same way? I would say the same thing...
insanelyXnikki 18
I would.
ArienMC 4
YDI for trying to prove it to her, when you were sick. You should of waited until you felt better. You're dumb.
insanelyXnikki 18
You should've just told her about your virus... and anyone that likes to sit around and call people 'anorexic' is an ass anyway...
lolyeahthatsme 11
I eat too dammit!
KrazyKatz3 26
Why would you need to prove yourself to her?