Today, I realized that my boyfriend does not stop by my apartment to give me a kiss between classes. He is actually stopping by between his classes to steal my condoms because he is too cheap to pay for them when he cheats on me. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my boyfriend admitted to me that the reason he won't have sex with me is because "Condoms are too expensive." FML
Today, it was my last day with my boyfriend before he went to college. At the store, he got a huge box of condoms. When I asked why he was getting so many, he said they were for the girls he meets at college. He then asked me to steal them for him. FML
Today, it was my last day with my boyfriend before he went to college. At the store, he got a huge box of condoms. When I asked why he was getting so many, he said they were for the girls he meets at college. He then asked me to steal them for him. FML
Today, my boyfriend informed me that to save money, he's been using the same condom for the last month. FML
Today, while my boyfriend was packing for his annual hunting trip, I saw him slip a box of condoms into his bag. FML
Today, the condom slipped off, because my boyfriend refuses to admit that he needs to use smaller condoms. FML
Today, my otherwise lovely boyfriend of a month showed his true colors. He freaked out when he learned that I use tampons instead of pads. He yelled that using them is like cheating on him, because his penis is the only thing that should ever enter me. FML
Today, I discovered my boyfriend has been slipping me abortion pills to "supplement" my regular birth control. FML
Today, I went into my older brother's room to get a condom. This happened the other day too when my boyfriend forgot one. So I went in and there was a note that said, "Stop using my condoms. And your boyfriend sounds like a girl when he climaxes." FML
Today, I walked in on my girlfriend cheating on me. The guy turned around and said, "Sorry, I borrowed your condoms." FML
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Top comments
Skittlesbaby 7
poke holes in them
xxaybaybayxx 0
what a douchebag.
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Comments (164)
xxaybaybayxx 0
what a douchebag.
Finn_the_human 5
That's bizzonkers!
nickalamb 4
You could've erased all those 'dude's you typed, dude. Now give me a dollar!
pimplayer 0
well atleast his using protection, the ultimate douchebag would have gave u an STD
JERZBornNRaised 7
no i think hes a caring and loyal bf........ -_-, OP find someone better, yea i know it sucks now but soon youll find someone better that wont treat you like shit
thegreat1_one 0
u keep condoms? what kind of ***** r u
Doortje 30
Are you ******* kidding me #72?
nalia18 8
i would have poisend the condoms with crabs! haha wont be cheating on me or anyone else! He would have those for the rest of his life!
staceysgenesis16 0
what a *****.. id shove those condoms up his ass ..
mzeemzima 0
wait y do u have guy condoms anyway huh?? BUSTED!!
steveakafranxy 7
I hate when they moderate comments, that means I can't read them
shift_love 13
at least he's doing it safely and now you know he's not spreading what he could be catching to you fyl
Skittlesbaby 7
poke holes in them
Nimmrodel 11
So cruel but lol all the same
hatepineapple 14
Um...no? Who says that the girl he's cheating with knows about the OP? That's the point of cheating: only the cheater knows. Poking holes would only hurt the other girl and the baby emotionally, financially, and possibly physically with STDs. Obviously we can tell that the boyfriend is a douche that can't commit. Who says he would raise the baby, or even pay for child support?
Nimmrodel 11
it was a funny comment try not to take everything so seriously.
Cinn_fml 23
It's not funny, it's plain stupid. OP - Well, at least you know how much of a jerk he is now rather than later.
hatepineapple 14
11, ...not really. It's akin to saying "Key her car". It accomplishes nothing. Now what 16 suggested would be excellent >:D
TXjuggalo972 6
just poke a hole in his ****
dbaldonado 0
lmfao
aardvarkish 17
I'm sure a syringe with cayenne juice could be guided carefully enough to not puncture the condom.
mfmylifesrsly 30
um 8 when someone cheats there are many times the person that the cheater is cheating on their partner with knows they're not single.
Alicia17C 2
it has nothing to do with keying his car. that's ruining his property. and if he's stealing damaged goods that's his problem. and yes it is a very funny comment.
Cinn_fml 23
How is it funny? Have you actually thought about what they said?
jess6blondie9 3
It's a joke. It's funny. It wouldn't be funny if someone actually did that, but no one did so just laugh about it instead of getting all booty tickled.
Prankster7o7 5
Hahaha, booty tickled.
Cinn_fml 23
Maybe it's because I've been on this site too long, but I can see some people actually doing it.
shannonreneee 11
It's a hilarious comment but if someone actually did that then they have issues. Just spread a rumor that he has an STI and that should do the trick
NinjaSmurf777 0
******* brilliant!
hatepineapple 14
45, I said HER car, not HIS. And yes it would be doing damage, much like giving an STD, and should she become pregnant: causing the girl to have to drop out of her education to raise a child along with the physical pain of birthing the child, or if she opted for an abortion she would have to risk the medical issues that arise with abortion, along with emotional damage. tl;dr poking holes in the condoms doesn't do jack shit to the guy, only the girl that DOESN'T KNOW HE'S CHEATING. There are so many other ways you could talk about to hurt the GUY. How is hurting the chick funny?
nalia18 8
Dont poke holesin them! Funny joke but as a black lady, you do sonething more like burning his house down when hes not home. Or shaving his head while hes sleeping. also you could find the creepiest looking makeup, put it, and hit him with a bat so many times hes gonna be crying! or you could just like i said befor find some bugs and put them on there and wait for the fireworks. Id go with red ants. ik i have a sick twisted mind set on destruction.
jess6blondie9 3
I'd be a bit scared to be your boyfriend that cheated on you.
2214rachel 0
haha I was just about to say poke holes in them!:P
wiggs5 0
22: you look like one of those girls who read books and etc ALL the time for fun, laugh a little.. this is funny. relax.
Doortje 30
Oh no, reading books for FUN? How horrific. Idiot.
Cinn_fml 23
Edit: Wtf, this shouldn't have gone here.
Cinn_fml 23
Ok, that was supposed to be a reply to wiggs5 (#128) and it keeps jumping. Darn comment bug.
ShelbyyCakess 0
cinn. it's funny so shuttheefuckkup. bitch(:
Cinn_fml 23
Oh, yeah, real funny to poke holes in condoms and get revenge on more than just the ******** guy. Also, just because we have different senses of humour doesn't mean you need to call me a bitch, regardless of whether or not you add a :). Also, to the other person - books can be funny you know. And there's nothing wrong with reading them.
aleasucks 0
HAHAHAHA OMG YES
MysticMint 0
Poke holes in those condoms. >:)
jsx12345 0
Read comment number three. Seriously it explains why not to
lilody_fml 0
what scum fo sure
DncrHap 9
hey, man. us college kids are broke! what do you expect?
chomoma 0
so you agree on his cheating ass? what's wrong with you?!
jessie_2828 0
broke maybe but cheating..... WTF
MissBunny25 0
24, that's not what she was saying, adorable little bear. she was saying she agrees with stealing the condoms. >:D
ImaWiseGuy 5
it's her fault for staying with him, whata dumb bitch......
jessie_2828 0
she just found out .... she didn't say she stayed with him or not. why so harsh???
MrCoolPants 7
Damn,That bear us cute
largefoofighter 0
Rawdog that ass lol
cldean24 4
What kind of creature is that, 24? It really is adorable.
feralphoenix 4
it's a squid
DncrHap 9
hahahaha. ohhh man. i was definitely kidding.
wiggs5 0
polar bear
born_hustla 26
lmao
Doortje 30
Wow, what a jerk. I hope you dumped his cheap, cheating ass.
BrokenDreamer24 15
I second that motion.
babycakesy 0
third! jeeez.
CateXOX 0
I want to know what classes he's taking.
101autie 0
wow dude thats sux oops i have too pay my dad a dollar he makes me and my sister pay a dollar everytime we say dude cuz of over usage of the word dude oops another one! im loosin big money
Stunsz 0
This is fml no one cares about you and your dads little dude punishment
skitzofreniks 5
he should also make you pay for your poor grammar. cuz dat wud b funie n ur dad cud mak millionz!!
twobig4u 3
^win!!
Brandon_ryan 0
quite the picture you got there
ninjasaurous 0
No one cares, my dude. Oops I messed up dude. Wow dude, this sucks.