Today, there was a 4 year-old boy behind me on my flight. When I looked at him, he screamed playfully and hid. I decided to play tiger with him. While I was grinning like a tiger and trying to scratch him, he smashed a water bottle across my face. I now have a black eye. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was coming home from a much-needed vacation. The time I spent on the plane consisted of kids screaming and throwing tantrums. One of them managed to give me a black eye with a shoe. Their mom pretended to be asleep so I'd have to deal with her kids for her. FML
Today, my one-year-old son threw up on the man sitting next to us on a plane. I felt bad and apologized profusely. When I tried to give him money for dry cleaning, he slapped me. FML
Today, one of the children at my daycare came up to me and bit me on the face. He laughed so hard at my scream, that he threw up in my lap. FML
Today, I was on a roller coaster and this 13 year old sitting next to me was completely terrified. To cheer him up, I threw my hands in the air. While my hands were up, we hit a curve and I elbowed him in the face, making him cry. FML
Today, I was on a three hour flight to Los Angeles for a corporate meeting. The woman next to me instantly fell asleep and snored louder than a freight train, while the kid behind me made a hobby of thashing my seat from behind. When I peered over and asked him to stop, he spat in my face. FML
Today, I was asleep on a plane. I woke up after feeling the plane jolt and I screamed at the top of my lungs. The little girl next to me told me I was a sissy. Everyone around us laughed. FML
Today, I flew a toy airplane into my face. FML
Today, my 15-year-old son got so enraged at a fly that kept harassing him, that he ended up slapping himself in the face as it flew by him. This caused him to fall out of his chair, at which point he broke down into a mess of tears, humiliating me in front of everyone. FML
Today, I was playing with my four month old daughter, flying her in the air like an airplane. I open my mouth saying 'Weeee', and she vomited on my face. FML
Today, a toddler threw up on my backpack mid-flight. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
SunDropGirl 0
you could have said hi or played peek a boo but instead you decided to play tiger.. you have a way with children who aren't yours... it would have been cute if it was your kid not a stranger sorry op
HeavyMetalViking 0
Is "play tiger" the slang for "going all pedobear"?
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (129)
MackS89 0
Well now you know not to mess with other peoples kid ass hole.
underdose 9
one more black eye and you'll be a panda :D
sullyball33 0
you're a ****** dude.
chronicxxl 0
"y r u" not on your knees? There are reasons to everything
x143iloveyoux 0
TThats actually EXTREMELY ockward....
ryanc14 0
Dumbass i would to lol FAIL
onthetoilet 3
why would you think that's cute/funny do it to your own kid not a stranger. Really? wow. it's a good thing that all he did
dez63 9
chance you take when you play with a strangers kid
birdie013 0
it's the black eye of the tiger!
Mara2714 0
Exactly how does one "grin like a tiger"?