Today, my son told me he was afraid of monsters under his bed. When I poked my head under to show him nothing was there, the family cat sprang out and clawed me in the face. Now I have a gash on my chin, and my son refuses to go anywhere near his bed. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was lying in bed with my cat. I must have looked at him the wrong way or something, because he hissed and savagely clawed at my face without warning. FML
Today, my 18 year old son asked me to check if there were any monsters under his bed. FML
Today, while I was trying to get to sleep, I heard a strange noise coming from the bunk bed above mine. I looked up to see what it was and my cat vomited over the edge, onto my face. FML
Today, I was awakened by a small scary dark figure approaching me while making creepy noises. I screamed, kicked it away, and buried my face under my pillow. Later, after braving up, I turned on the lights. It was my sick 3-year-old niece, now dazed and coughing blood. FML
Today, my son was crying and refusing to sleep in his room because a spider ran along the wall, and it's now hiding somewhere. He’s 19. FML
Today, I was messing with my cat by moving my hand around under the sheets to make it look like a mouse, making him pounce at it. Without thinking, I brought my hand up to scratch my nose and was immediately attacked by flailing claws. FML
Today, I was laying with my face dangling down the side of my bed, when my kitten rushed up to me looking worried. He sniffed me for a while, then decided the best thing to do was to stand on his hind legs and start punching my face like a speed bag. FML
Today, I walked into my son's room only to be attacked by a swarm of flies. I'm afraid to go back in there. FML
Today, my cat tried to kill me. While I was sleeping, he put his paws on either side of my face and laid down, covering my nose and mouth. While I was struggling to free myself, I could hear my sister laughing next to me. FML
Today, I was frantically woken up from a nap by my son who was scared because there was a dog in the house. We don't own a dog. It was the new neighbor's dog. When my son opened the door to go play outside, the dog came barreling in. My kid and cats were terrified. FML
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Top comments
Checker 20
Check again...?
irimalovecheer98 5
Lol, I feel bad for your son
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Comments (105)
thwei 0
Lol poor cat.
UrLyfSuxx 0
More like poor OP. . .
Damn_Hippster 11
Now your son has to be afraid of monsters and cats under his bed.
freakinglaugher 10
Just tell him that the monster only eats children that don't obey their parents.
bizarre_ftw 22
BUT THE CAT CAME BACK!!!!!!
blackheart24 10
Monsters under the bed are real -.- trust me, mine talks to me sometimes.
urdirtyolduncle 15
And mines touch me in inappropriate places :(
Llama_Face89 34
49- hey! I only LOOK like a monster...doesn't mean I am one... :P
TheDeadlyTurtle 7
It's a good thing she didn't find me in the closet O.o
death_dolphin24 0
Bizarre, please STFU.
Checker 20
Check again...?
jonn090 13
That's some ghetto cat
teentee401 37
I don't think you know what ghetto means
irimalovecheer98 5
Lol, I feel bad for your son
BayleeWasHere 1
I feel bad for your son.
slick5880 22
Be afraid... Be very afraid of the cat
m0tl3ycru3 0
Those two gleaming eyes staring back at you!
Ecklcakes 15
Must have been ******* scary as shit. Your mum/dad tries to show you not to be scared and comes up with a gash on their face.
vitaldisplay 0
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Your a bad father.
bigAC 6
how?
Philliesfan9391 3
First of all, it doesn't say if he is a guy or a girl. and how is he a bad parent?
jackassiddy 8
and you're bad at grammar...
iam_yummylicious 12
Obviously he's a father because gay marriage is now legal in NY. So obviously only gay married men occupy the entire state. *trollface*
j_cat187 20
You're a bad mother
lidemocr 0
I was just thinking the opposite about OP. it's a funny situation but sort of cute that he was checking for monsters so that his kid wouldn't be scared. It ended badly but I'm sure OP had the best of intentions!
Glitterhinoceros 14
Rawr
SweatyManNipplez 0
Omg your hot
SweatyManNipplez 0
Your sexy
Justin23L 2
Meow! :D
ArchxAngel 9
Moo. I'm A Frog. :3
BayleeWasHere 1
I hate nothing more than when people say "rawr" or other dionosaur sounds in effort to look "cute".
Dawnxxoo 11
hahahaha that totally sucks
anjtrg_1112 23
Technically you were right because there weren't any monsters , just an evil cat (:
2ndSucks 15
Damn demon cats.
cheeseboy77 0
take advantage of this. tell him you saw the monster, but if he acts good the monster will leave. then you're good and have a good son