Today, while at work in a medical office, I had the itchiest and most distracting bug bite. I went the supply closet and got an alcohol cleansing wipe to help cool it off. It worked great but I was then fired for theft for using what costs less than a tenth of a cent. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my OCD manager sprayed my hands with chemicals because I'd touched the bin while throwing away a piece of paper. My hands are now covered in itchy, unattractive rashes. FML
Today, I had an unbearable itch on my foot that I could not make go away with my nails, so I grabbed the stapler in my drawer to scratch it with. Bad idea. FML
Today, I was working in a call center when I smelled perfume. I'm allergic, and it triggered my asthma. When I came back, some jerk had sprayed it all over my work area. I couldn't go near it for the rest of my shift, therefore I had to go home early, and got my paycheck docked. FML
Today, I had an allergic reaction to my deodorant. My armpits wouldn't stop itching, and by the time my shift was over, they were raw and bloody. FML
Today, I went to the doctor for what I thought was a persistent bug bite. Turns out it was a mole I'd never noticed. I had been scratching it then applying anti-itch cream for weeks. FML
Today, I was in a shopping center when I went to the toilet. I came out, washed my hands and suddenly got a massive itch in my crotch. Without thinking I itched it. I then had to walk around the center with a wet hand print on my crotch. FML
Today, I found out I'm allergic to bug repellent. So instead of having a couple of itchy bug bites, my skin feels like it's on fire and is violently itchy everywhere the repellent has touched. FML
Today, I was applying some Icy Hot to my sore thighs, when I accidentally got a little on my dime sacks. For the next hour, it felt like someone had lit a match under my plums. FML
Today, I noticed a rash of insect bites on the backs of my thighs and buttocks. Upon further investigation, it appears that the inside of the chair in my work cubicle is infested with bedbugs. I'm too paranoid to sit in any work chair now. There are 12 hours left in my shift. FML
Today, while working at the store, a lady grabbed a bunch of T-shirts and started talking on the phone. She then walked out the store with them. I ran after her, and she sprays me with mace telling me to not interrupt her while on the phone. My eyes burned for hours. Oh, and I was fired because of the huge loss. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
thefmlman2011 37
probably would’ve asked first before taking?
eellik 12
Hang on. Was this an inventorized business asset? So the equivalent of a Walmart employee taking a water bottle out of the store without paying? If so, I can kinda understand why they don't want employees to just take it, as it throws off their inventory and accounting.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (3)
thefmlman2011 37
probably would’ve asked first before taking?
eellik 12
Hang on. Was this an inventorized business asset? So the equivalent of a Walmart employee taking a water bottle out of the store without paying? If so, I can kinda understand why they don't want employees to just take it, as it throws off their inventory and accounting.
Thaylok 17
that item costing .1 cent is billable for what? 75 dollars...