Today, my otherwise lovely boyfriend of a month showed his true colors. He freaked out when he learned that I use tampons instead of pads. He yelled that using them is like cheating on him, because his penis is the only thing that should ever enter me. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I realized I get more pleasure from a tampon than my boyfriend I have been having sex with for the past six months. FML
Today, my boyfriend drove me home. I mentioned how I had recently started my period and he freaked out, saying I would "leak" through my tampon onto his seat. He made me sit on towels all the way home. FML
Today, I decided to make the switch from pads to tampons. My boyfriend ended up having to show me how to apply them. FML
Today, I realized my tampon goes deeper than my boyfriend. FML
Today, my boyfriend asked me how women could urinate with a tampon in. FML
Today, my boyfriend clearly stated that I was "useless" when on my period. FML
Today, I woke up to my boyfriend throwing my birth control box at me and shouting that I was a slut for cheating on him since we never had sex. I attempted to explain the birth control was for a condition I have that causes my period to be non-existent. He didn't believe me. FML
Today, my boyfriend stayed over at my place for the first time. I left him in the bedroom for a couple of minutes while I used the toilet, and when I came back, he was holding my vibrator. He angrily asked me, "What the hell is this? You know this is cheating, right?" FML
Today, my boyfriend woke me up by playing with the string of my tampon. FML
Today, my boyfriend dumped me, accusing me of lying to him about "being a hermaphrodite". His almost total lack of knowledge about female anatomy led him to believe that my clitoris is actually an extremely tiny penis. FML
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Top comments
Nyx_fml 23
Now wait until he finds out about your vibrator.
LanceGoodthrust 19
He should really stop and think about whether or not he wants to compare the size of his equipment to a tampon, and claim that the tampon is winning.
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Comments (172)
rachel_arielh 2
You should be like that's cool I totally understand. Next time I'm on my period I will use pads and then bleed everywhere because that's what ducking happens when they don't stay In place!
Lotex 18
he still might be a lovely boyfriend, but he's a complete moron
imchacon22 19
Lmao!!!! You're boyfriend sounds like a retard
MiissAshleyy 19
lol
chosha_fml 27
Wow, that is Olympic level fucktardery.
evalu8tor 12
Just so long as he doesn't prevent you from eating corn dogs you should be ok
ben_e_boy28 4
Tell him to cut his hands off! ;)
carmagnet 11
He sounds kinda selfish. It seems like he is the type that won't do foreplay and is done the moment he is 'done'. I think it should be a shared thing. You both concentrate on making the other happy and then in the end everyone is happy and no one is jealous of a tampon!! It's a win-win-win! Lol
miami_girl_1 3
Lol he's jealous of a tampon??
ViviMage 40
Speculum. Yeast medication. A doctor's hands when you are about to deliver a baby. Your personal health cheats on him?? So a condom is cheating on you??
DanielleinDC 34
The speculum during her annual exam, the swab for the Pap smear, the practitioner's hands when s/he does the exam... Are you not allowed to **********? I mean, wouldn't your fingers go there? Or a vibrator? What about foreplay? He's not going to use his fingers up there? Tell him that he can get over the fact that you use tampons, or his penis will never enter you again.