Today, the man of my dreams turned out to be the worst kisser I've ever encountered. I now have a huge hickey on my chin to remember the experience by. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I found out that the person I'm seeing is a terrible kisser. I really like them, but it's awful. FML
Today, the man of my dreams kissed me. It was everything I had imagined it would be until in the middle of the kiss, he burped. FML
Today, my boyfriend gave me a hickey. On my forehead. FML
Today, after getting together with the guy who I like, and who actually likes me back, he finally kissed me. Unfortunately, he kisses like he’s trying to suck out my soul. FML
Today, while hanging out with this guy I'm interested in, we turned and made eye contact. We were face to face and I thought he was finally going to kiss me. He decided to lick my face from chin to forehead instead. FML
Today, I got my first kiss. He had an allergic reaction to my chapstick, and broke out in hives. FML
Today, I finally got together with this great guy I've had a crush on for a while. He told me before that he is quite inexperienced, which usually doesn't bother me at all. Turns out "inexperienced" translates to "I will include your nose and chin in our kissing" in this case. FML
Today, I have blue lips because of a guy whose face I don't even remember didn't know the difference between kissing and sucking. FML
Today, my boyfriend decided that a good time to have our first kiss was on a roller-coaster, right before a huge drop. He bit through my lip. FML
Today, I was on a date. I noticed he kept looking at my lips. Thinking he wanted to kiss me, I leaned in closer. Disgusted, he pulled away and said, "I'm sorry, but that pimple on your chin is, like, staring at me or something." FML
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Top comments
Seabass_Chan 33
Teach him. People stay awful at things because others don't show them how to improve.
BantasaurusRex 13
Aww chin up, it can only get better.
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Comments (51)
BantasaurusRex 13
Aww chin up, it can only get better.
KneelToMyPotato 18
Think of it this way, at least you got a kiss from the man of your dreams
Seabass_Chan 33
Teach him. People stay awful at things because others don't show them how to improve.
One_Way 43
Sometimes the others don't even tell people they are awful at something. They just cringe every time a person attempts it and later go back to "fix" it. Nothing will improve unless he knows there's a problem.
weezypanda420 22
That's a good idea.. Tho sometimes they get offended and upset..
higgysaurus 18
#24 I am sure saying "I want to teach you to kiss better, so we are going to be kissing a lot more" will cheer anybody up haha
brenton490 19
Are we sure he missed, or was this just him marking territory ?
R3TROxLOV3 32
Sometimes people just don't care if they're bad at something, and have no interest in kissing. I had an ex who would run his tongue over my teeth (front and back) everytime he kissed me, and no matter how many times I told him that it grossed me out, he wouldn't stop. He thought he was a great kisser, and I eventually just refused to kiss him at all because of his refusal to stop bad kissing practices.
loko0909 13
Direct him to your lips next time maybe? if there will be a next time.
kmw003 17
Talk to him about it. If you continue seeing him, and don't talk to him, he's going to keep on doing it thinking you enjoy it. Hopefully that works out for you!
iwanttogotoparis 26
Give him some pointers
brendejafulable 41
he's not the man of your dreams if you do not like the way he kisses.
DoomedGemini 38
Or he just needs direction? People aren't born with the ability to be good at pleasing their partner, it takes time, practice, and direction. There's no school for it, so someone has to teach him.
Elban 20
Sometimes they are. Like some people being naturally athletic
oiler 21
be happy it didnt go any lower
lexred 30
I sympathize with u....the girl of my dreams had once told me I was small downstairs and broke up with me. Later on....all my gfs said that I was quite OK.
Xobubblyxo 23
Are there turtle necks that cover your chin?
lulinator 40
Probably not. But depending on the weather where OP is, a ski mask may work.
ThrottleJockey 36
If she works at a bank I'm going to go out on a limb to say that a ski mask may not be a wise choice.