Today, I have a cold. I can't begin to count how many times I've sneezed throughout the day, but I can count how many times I've sneezed so hard that I've peed myself: twice. Once while I was at work helping a customer, the other while sitting on the couch next to my boyfriend. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I sneezed and peed myself while working out at the gym. FML
Today, after just waking up, I sneezed, which caused me to piss myself. FML
Today, I was giving a class presentation, when I suddenly sneezed so hard I wet myself. FML
Today, I peed myself in the dressing room after work when I sneezed. Someone else just walked in as I was trying to dry off my jeans with paper, and probably smelled that I had peed myself. FML
Today, I was holding in pee because i was so busy at work. When I finally got up to relieve myself, I pulled down my pants, sneezed at that exact moment and peed all over the bathroom floor. FML
Today, I had a cold and was vomiting. I sneezed really hard, smacking my nose onto the toilet seat. I woke up a few minutes later with my nose bleeding, painful, and still stuffy. FML
Today, I sneezed four times in succession. The problem is that I've never sneezed more than three times in a row in my life, so the fourth one came as such a shock to me that I accidentally banged my head on my desk when it occurred. FML
Today, I sneezed so hard I fell down the stairs. FML
Today, for the first time in my life, I simultaneously sneezed, peed and farted. I was giving a presentation at work when this happened. FML
Today, as I was trying to get into the grocery store, I had a sneezing fit. I've typically never had one, so I didn't really know how to handle it. This one was a new record: 11 sneezes and I hadn't had the foresight to bring tissues. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
I_iz_B_a_troll 24
Well they say a sneeze is 1/8 of an ******; at least you're having fun.
Pleonasm 36
I hope they weren't laughing too hard achou! I know this isn't sneezy for you but hang in there, the cold will go away soon. You know what they say: Starve a fever, pee a cold.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (72)
lol70720 5
Whats with women and always needing to pee?
love_me_electric 20
Women have smaller bladders than men, therefore they need to empty it more often.
chippa 24
Yes, our reproductive organs are all inside and take up space. Also, our urethras are a lot shorter than a male's, so it's harder to hold.
xSalashawty 30
I have a cold too and know exactly how you feel. One minute I'd get the strong urge to sneeze, then the next, I'd be sneezing crazy. Laugh off the sneezing-til-you-pee thing too. I sure would. Anyways, get better soon~
spottyblanket 8
tissues contain small fibres which get into your nose and make you sneeze more. Use a hankie to blow your nose.
glamery 3
you definitely need to start doing your kegel exercises. squeeze them when you sneeze, it should prevent you from peeing. also when youre peeing in general, practise stopping your pee several times midflow. this also helps build up your muscles.
evebright 5
I HATE that! Damn kids cause that. I usually sneeze repeatedly until I pee, then I'm good. Even after I JUST peed!
Hammer01 8
Buy some pull ups.... Or some plastic panties.