Today, I finally started my job as an in-home caregiver. The man I was hired to care for died two hours after I made it to his house. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I wasn't allowed to work from home, despite being ill enough to just take the day off anyway, all so there could be "someone to answer the phone." The phone didn't ring once all day. FML
Today, my boss made me work a longer shift than usual. Not because he needed me in, but just so I'd finish at the same time as his brat of a son, and give him a lift home. FML
Today, I was at my boyfriend's house waiting to surprise him when he got home from work. I was laying in his bed when he called to tell me we were over. I couldn't leave before he got home. FML
Today, I showed up for my first shift in my new night job; I now work at an apartment complex during the day and at a gas station at night. It turns out that our biggest problem tenant in the former happens to be my boss in the latter. FML
Today, I overheard my boss stressing out over finding a replacement for me. I didn't know I was leaving. FML
Today, I lost my dog. I looked around my neighborhood for hours, and found him under my bed asleep when I got home. FML
Today, my family went on vacation. I had to stay home to take care of everyone's animals. I called my mom, who said she was too busy to talk to me. When my sister asked her who was on the phone, she replied, "The dog sitter." FML
Today, while battling a severe flu, I was forced to come to work by my manager. Upon arrival, I discovered that a colleague he likes who should be covering for me is out today. The reason? Her shoes hurt. FML
Today, I witnessed a car accident. Being an experienced paramedic, I rushed to the scene to see if anyone needed help. As I assessed the people involved, one of them pickpocketed me. FML
Today, I was told it was inconvenient for me to take lunch breaks, because someone else has to answer the phones and no one else wants to actually do any work. FML
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Top comments
Tcaret300 12
WHOEVER SAID YDI IS A TOTAL JERK!!!
linzbinzzz 7
awwww
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Comments (165)
101autie 0
Sooome people like to kill innocently.... jk that wuld suck.
natural_blues 0
oooh harsh
man_in_black08 28
iphone 4 eh^^
fireman5955 0
should be a Droid.
kennar123 0
tomorrow is another day!!!
perdix 31
What's the problem? The pay for hit men and assassins is much better than that for home health-care nurses. "Dirty Deeds Done Dirt Cheap" is a lie -- dirty deeds cost a fortune!
darkmis1 18
There was a lady arrested for murder. She was an in home care taker and killed all the old people for their social security money and then buried them in her yard. I wonder if she and the OP are related...
perdix 31
Probably not, the stupid OP feels bad about his victim. . ., um, I mean, . . . patient dying on him instead of seeing the business opportunity at hand.
darkmis1 18
That's what he WANTS us to think...
perdix 31
I'm so naïve! You are probably right. I just don't know how diabolical minds work . . .
darkmis1 18
But I do *cackle cackle*
cobras40 0
lol fail
enonymous 9
Did you at least get him to change his insurance policy and will so that you're the benefactor?
enonymous 9
It's ok I hired them to be my personal wiper. Had to teach them it's 2 fingers counter clockwise 3 times them you put the cream on then the diaper... she'll learn soon enough
Sprocket 5
Oh my God! You killed Kenny!
Jrefinne 7
You bastard!
4XxXo_OxXx4 0
...with a NAILGUN!
tanzanika 0
you could make a fortune taking care of mother-in-laws :)
deathtrap 0
lmao
lmaoatall 6
your family owns the funeral home, don't they? that's about as bad and low as my buddy Jered who owns his own tire shop throwing screws in the road! shame on you!!!