Today, I lost my dog. I looked around my neighborhood for hours, and found him under my bed asleep when I got home. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I cleaned my apartment from top to bottom. Once I was done, I looked over at my puppy, who then woke up, stretched, got out of his basket and started to pee. I shouted, "No!" Scared, he then ran all over the place, still peeing. FML
Today, I took the dog for a 45 minute walk/jog. She sniffed everything on the ground like she always does. She marked her territory twice, then we finally got home. As soon as I took her off the leash inside, she ran to the kitchen and took a dump right on the kitchen mat. FML
Today, my car broke down in the middle of nowhere. I walked about 3 miles to the nearest house to call a tow truck. When I got back to where I left my car, it was gone. FML
Today, I was walking out of my front door in the town where I intern. I live alone and know no one. As I'm locking the door, I see a golf ball wedged between my mat and step. I notice that there's writing on it so I pick it up to read, "You look hot when you sleep." FML
Today, I was out walking my dog. I was throwing a stick in the lake so he could go get it (he loves swimming). A friend called me. After I was done calling, another friend came by, and we talked for a while. When my dog barked, I accidentally threw my iPhone into the water instead of his stick. FML
Today, I was at my boyfriend's house waiting to surprise him when he got home from work. I was laying in his bed when he called to tell me we were over. I couldn't leave before he got home. FML
Today, I was watching a movie on TV. One of the characters has the same name as my dog, and when his name was called, my dog got so excited that he jumped face-first into my TV. FML
Today, my family went on vacation. I had to stay home to take care of everyone's animals. I called my mom, who said she was too busy to talk to me. When my sister asked her who was on the phone, she replied, "The dog sitter." FML
Today, I had been sick all day, so to cheer me up my dad drove me to get ice cream. On our way back, we hit a puppy. FML
Today, I got lost, and eventually noticed that I'd passed by the same house a few times. Apparently somebody who lives on that street noticed as well, because the next time I passed by, the police were waiting for me. FML
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Top comments
BB_ava 0
That's the first place I'd look...
Livinia 11
You should be glad it's safe now :)
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Comments (118)
firecopy 6
didn't you use dog treats!?!?!
daisyloo 7
Apparently not...but your dog is safe, that's all that matters!:)
arlekin21 0
this happens to me all the time
ImaWiseGuy 5
get you some dooby snacks I mean scooby snacks and that should fix your problem...
iSitt 0
should gave just yelled that you're going for a walk. that excites them.
tsim_fml 0
You call your dog an "it"? wtf is wrong with you
theten_fml 9
my dog died =[
neveragain234 1
dislike
bubble25_fml 5
u know how in the dog movies they always have that line where the dog says something like "i have to walk my human"? well, this is what happened to op, but the dog is both lazy and clever, so it made op walk by himself by ingeniously hiding.
alicianoar 7
It? You're a shit owner. I hope your dog ***** in your mouth while you're sleeping. Ydi.
IndiRae 9
Anyone willing who notices their pets absence and is willing to go look for them, in my opinion, isn't a 'shit owner'
lonewolf6613 4
well said 16 I give you props :) 2 why are you so gross? :(
JetLifeNextLife 0
2- did you not read the FML?
sourgirl101 29
I think 2 is pointing out that the OP called the dog "IT" instead of him/her, as if the animal is an object. I could be wrong.(:
nerdsgetmehot 23
#2 Even good pet owners have pets that escape.
jdawgg92 1
#29 is right. #2 is pointing out that the person called the dog an "it". I noticed that too
grapisy 8
my dogs used too escape all the time, but they'd run so far its impossuble to find them until some other people find them and call us.
parxxx 0
...
Kryson53 0
that's a little harsh for referring to your dog as "it" don't you think?
jewfro311 0
we have all been trolled
Livinia 11
You should be glad it's safe now :)
snade 0
sometimes the answer is right in front of you and you see it last
gagaman_fml 0
well said:) my doggy got hit by a car bumper in the head and died instantly!
ipwnlosers 4
And you're happy about that?
instnt1nfction 17
congratulations
BB_ava 0
That's the first place I'd look...
enonymous 9
Same here when I lose my Hot Dogs I check under my bed.
abby1029 8
lmfao ^
317theterrible 0
under the bed is always the first place i look for just about anything
balest22 0
U didnt look in ur house?!? WOW?!?
Sniper3000 0
of course the op looked in the house just not under the bad
Sniper3000 0
bed************
Iggygg 0
At least you didn't find it dead.
montagicals 0
Hahahaha, entire team is BABIES!
alexsmokesdro91 0
usually I take the time to look around the house before going all throughout the neighborhood.. but hey that's just me.
fadingfaith 4
Its probably a bigger dog, because if it was a small dog you think it be hiding since it's so tiny. A big dog you automatically think it was lost if you can't spot it.