Today, as I was walking home, I noticed a man and a woman arguing in their driveway. To avoid an awkward situation, I crossed the street. I then had to walk past a creepy guy watering his plants in his underwear while looking directly at me. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was waiting at a traffic light. I saw my neighbour and her new boyfriend crossing the road, then noticed as he started grabbing his crotch, but thought nothing of it. They both then pulled down their pants and urinated in the middle of the busy intersection. FML
Today, while driving home from work, I saw my boyfriend mugging a woman on the sidewalk. FML
Today, I went out to go meet up with a guy. I walked all the way to his house just to see him. Then he made me hide behind a bush till his girlfriend left. FML
Today, I was walking down the street and while stopped at a light, this old man waved at me. Thinking nothing of it, I walked through a parking lot to get to where I was going, where he not only followed me, but mistook me for a prostitute. It was 5pm. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were making out on his deck out back. When leaving, I heard the sliding glass door open on the upper deck, I froze in the yard to not be seen. Too bad I didn't move. Apparently his dad pees off the deck at night. I had to walk home covered in pee. FML
Today, as I walked home, I heard the people behind me in an argument over my gender. FML
Today, a creep called me out in the street and asked me why I was in that part of that street, because he "knows " I live in another part of the street, and he found it "odd" that I was there. He was smiling all that time too. FML
Today, as I was going to bed, I spotted a man staring at my window from a neighbor's yard. Ten minutes later, he was still there. I freaked out, started crying, and contemplated calling the cops. My creeper turned out to be the neighbor's wooden lawn ornament. FML
Today, my crazy neighbor screamed at me from her porch for walking "too close" to her plants. I was on the sidewalk. She sprayed me with her hose anyway. FML
Today, I went on my afternoon stroll to my local park. As I reached the park a little boy was peeing in the bushes nearby. His mother called. As I walked by, he turned, still peeing, right to me. He ended up peeing on the front of my pants and on my shoes. My house is two miles away from the park. FML
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Top comments
Zestus 19
im sure hes a nice guy. i water my plants naked all the time. its not like they have eyes or anything
flashback.miss 28
Should've walked past the couple, OP. Chances are they were so caught up in their anger at each other, they wouldn't have even noticed you.
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Comments (69)
CookieLovesBoo 16
You were on a two way street of awkwardness .
scottyspot 11
Sounds like it's time to move or pick a new route.
cmac86 24
quite an interesting neighborhood you live in.
deepunder 17
Now I've read all the comments up to here and no one has mentioned what I said earlier. Sounds like a fun neighborhood... (SARCASM!) Here's some more-u should do something weird to hide better... I would put on headphones and pretend to not hear them. Even if it was just headphones, no MP3 player. Just to clarify, iPods are a brand of MP3. Add better sarcasm people Please dislike this comment so people won't waste time reading it, even if they want to.
roro_superloser 13
Haha atleast he didn't water the pants with himself :-p
jensen21 19
What kind of neighborhood are you walking through?
thatisfuckedup 6
I'm afraid that that is the start of a very ****** up horror movie. I would suggest that you prepare yourself for anal rape (regardless of gender) and the imminent severing of your jugular.
yukiokashi 12
awkward...
hazerdagreek 18
Time to make some alterations to your route home...
Alpot 10
I'd been reading "plants" as pants the whole time... FML