Today, I was packing up my stuff about to go home. I shut off my MacBook but was still pretending to work for the last few minutes, typing on the keyboard. A good way through, I realized my co-worker sitting across from me could see that the Apple logo was off. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was working on entering a lot of information in the system. When I'd finished, I closed the screen to move on to the next steps, my boss came by to see how I was doing, just in time to see me looking at a now-blank screen. I'm convinced that my boss thinks I closed a screen that wasn't work related. FML
Today, I was logging into my work computer. My account became locked due to the many failed attempts at typing my password. Thinking I was alone, I said, “Fuck this shit” while dragging the keyboard off my desk. Turns out my supervisor was in the other room. I'd forgotten I'd changed my password the other day. FML
Today, I was working from home. I felt very sleepy, so I set my online status “Active” and went back to bed. I woke up to 3 missed calls from my boss and an email from him, containing a webcam screenshot of me asleep in bed. I totally forgot he has remote access to my computer. FML
Today, I was trying to sneak a nap at work by lying on my desk with my arms over my head, hoping my computer screen would cover me. I woke up to find my coworker had taped a sign on the back of my screen that said, "I’m not sleeping, I'm just buffering." Pictures were taken. FML
Today, I left my MacBook Pro on the kitchen counter, so my mother later ran it through the dishwasher, thinking it was a “lovely apple chopping board”. FML
Today, my boss yelled at me for having Facebook open at work. That's fine, I closed it and continued on with my work. In a meeting later on I could see the reflection of my boss's laptop screen in a mirror behind her desk. For two hours, I watched her scroll through her Facebook feed. FML
Today, after work, I was saying goodbye to my last remaining friend I worked with because she was going to be leaving for college. My manager saw me talking and made me clock back in and work, because, "If you have time to talk, you have time to work." FML
Today, my boss told me I could do my university work as long as I served customers when they came in. No customers came in all day, then I realised I’d been so focused on my laptop, I'd never noticed I’d left the bolt on the door, so customers couldn’t get in. My boss sacked me. FML
Today, I realized how much I'm on the computer. I tried to "CTRL+Z" on something I wrote down on my paper. FML
Today, I guess I accidentally left Facebook open on my work computer while I went to the bathroom, because my boss updated my status to "Unemployed." FML
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Top comments
BimmerDriver 23
If you're not going to work, why not just mess around online rather than faking work on an off computer?
Verst 16
Why fake working for the last few minutes? Finish strong!
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Comments (101)
CookieLovesBoo 16
Fail.
xlord 27
We could even go as far to say that it was a fail of epic proportions.
SamanthaNGoree 10
If you're going to hurry and get first comment, why not make it something worth reading?
SamanthaNGoree 10
If you're going to get the first comment, make it something worth reading.
hashshim 23
76: Getting first comment shouldn't matter at all. Which means that getting first doesn't mean you need to write the comment of the year.
CookieLovesBoo 16
I wrote what I wanted . I guess your mad you didn't get the first comment? Such a mature way to show it btw, and I didn't put my comment up for your entertainment .
SamanthaNGoree 10
I didn't say anything about comment of the year. Merely that it should be worth reading. Also, the first comment is probably the most read. Make it worth our time. That's all I'm saying.
\ 28
Well YDI for being absurdly clumsy.
Pwn17 25
Not clumsy, just stupid.
Verst 16
@2 Do you mean nonobservant?
\ 28
you are the most finicky people about word choice. Thumb me down, I dare you!
isallwaysme 27
challenge accepted.
IIFenix 3
Um it's not about word choices here it's about using a word that actually says how stupid op is....and not that he may trip going up stairs...
lifesucks1217 6
i wouldn't say he is stupid...
utohspaghettios 10
challenge accepted and destroyed lol
red_headforlife 15
Not much to say except maybe hide it better next time?
RedWingSD 6
Not hide it better don't be lazy and work and people wonder why Americans are labeled as fat and lazy well op couldn't even sit there and type which is their job!!!!! Ydi and ydi of you get fired too!!!!
Ian7890 23
It's only a few minutes.
JACKxRAWR 22
Just a quick tip, when I'm revising or whatever I open two word documents. On one I do what I'm supposed to be doing and on the other I start writing a story, and whenever I need a break from working I'll write some more of my story for a bit. To anyone watching, you look like a very hard-working person.
DyslexicPanda 12
You could always just say the logo sometimes doesn't work if asked
BimmerDriver 23
If you're not going to work, why not just mess around online rather than faking work on an off computer?
Epikouros 32
Exactly. That's what FML is for!
Pwn17 25
Why the hell were you pretending to type anyway? If it was only a few minutes, what's the big deal? Don't be so lazy!
Verst 16
Why fake working for the last few minutes? Finish strong!
feelingold 18
It's all about the strong finish
Jiinxx 8
that's what she said
InfamousRaider 15
XD
Doritozilla 20
Why didn't you just go home?
DyslexicPanda 12
You don't have a job, do you?
Doritozilla 20
sadly, I don't *rolls up in ball and cries*
dbaliki918 6
Heh, it happens to the best of us :p Don't worry about it too much!
Wizardo 34
Play some minesweeper or pinball or something next time... Noob.
crazystoner5150 9
There is no minesweep or pinball on a Mac. Idiot
sonicgreg 12
Macs are for plebians.
BrookRae 19
Whether that is true or not, not every person in the world has a Mac or ever had a Mac.
MidnightWolf3 12
@31 That's what the internet is for...idiot.
Wizardo 34
#31, hold your horses there, there's new age invention called the internet, it can do amazing things you should check it out and whoever has a Mac for work is stupid, PC is where its at. ******* idiots.
Ambient25 25
I bet your coworker was like "well **** you too then"
botanistjessica 24
Please explain how you came to this conclusion.