Today, I was caught "experimenting" with my friend at his house. His parents called mine, and my dad came to drive me home. On the way back, he tried to cheer me up by saying, "Son, don't be ashamed. When I was your age, I sucked a few dicks myself." Thanks for the info, Dad. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was going out with my boyfriend after recently coming out. On my way out the door, my dad looked me dead in the eyes and said, "Suck that dick like a champ tonight, son." FML
Today, my dad gave my younger brother condoms and a pat on the back, even though he doesn't have a girlfriend. This is after called me a whore after he saw me kissing my long-term boyfriend last week. FML
Today, I was leaving the house to go on a date. My dad stopped me at the door and said confidently, "Tear that pussy up, son." I'm gay and my dad knows that. FML
Today, my ex-boyfriend decided to humiliate me by confessing to my dad in detail what he and I had done together and "apologizing" for taking my virginity. FML
Today, my dad walked in on me and my girlfriend having sex. His only reaction was to mutter, "Put some back into it, son." before awkwardly sidling out. FML
Today, my mom came home drunk and crying, so I tried to comfort her and asked what was wrong. She wasted no time admitting that she'd hooked up with her ex-husband, AKA my dad, but that it'd sucked for her because he has a tiny penis. Thanks, I really needed to know that. FML
Today, my friend decided to come clean to his parents about his pot usage. He told them that he did it with me on many occasions. His parents decided it would be the right thing to call my parents. Thanks a lot asshole. FML
Today, I went to my friend's house because his family was having a move away party for him. Everything was going good until his dad decided to give a toast. Including an anecdote about how he walked in on us watching porn together. FML
Today, another of my dad's blind dates went bad, so I took him out for a beer. I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and when I came back, two guys were congratulating my dad on scoring such a hot piece of ass, and said the sex must be awesome. My dad played along with it. FML
Today, my grandma drove me home from school early because I was sick. I went upstairs and heard my parents having sex. Embarrassed, I ran downstairs and was about to leave the house when I saw a car pull into the driveway. It was my dad. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
UndeadMongrel 7
At least your dad is trying to be supportive, you should be appreciative.
your_ma 27
A bit awkward yeah but to be fair is heart is clearly in the right place and he's trying to be nice.. He could have been a horrible homophobic dick about it!
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (214)
Anai08 17
So then "experimenting" runs in the family. I wonder what interesting stories your Mom might have!
RpiesSPIES 27
I was going to make a gay joke, but then you'll all get anal with me.
mrpotatohead36 7
I was going to tell a gay joke, butt **** it
kurodansei 16
Geez man, It's a comfort not a dick you don't have to take it so hard. Or do you? Sorry that was in bad taste. But your dad'll probably tell you it was just a little salty.
functional 13
haha
kurodansei 16
120 your ha ha outweighs the billion downard thumbs that I knew I would recieve for that comment.
lmaouloser 5
This is in poor taste, "so you're both faggots who think they like women."
perdix 31
So, we have a data point suggesting that bi-curiosity is hereditary.
s15c 9
I expect a complete essay in two days discussing the possibility of bi-curiosity being a hereditary trait.
lil_ham1644 29
Don't forget the punnet squares!
sniken 14
Following your fathers footsteps, guess it runs in the family! Just be glad he supports you and understand - not everyone has that! Sucks to have that image in your head though :p
JustKittyKat 24
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
My dad was one of the last people I told that I am not straight. (pansexual) When he found out, he told me it was "okay" to be "curious and experiment". He still thinks that's what's going on. To be honest, it took my mom about a year to warm up to it and realize that this is who I am, not a fad. It will get easier, sweetie. But you better be ******* grateful that your dad cares about you, and isn't being homophobic. Be open, be honest, be patient, be strong...and good luck!
kakarot2 11
What's pan?? Excuse my ignorance
JustKittyKat 24
I sure hope so. Thank you. Pan power! lol
ksks1234 33
#68: I did not know what it was either, so I looked it up. It is sexually/ romantically attracted to all sexual orientations/ identities.
sdh715 6
I don't understand, what is the difference between bisexual and pansexual?
pulsar_ 13
Bisexual implies there is only two genders; male and female. So you'd be attracted to those two. Pansexual is being attracted to all other sexualities+genders and whatnot (which you will have to google because there is a whole lot of them)
wjh100 13
the definition I found said you don't see someone as a gender and just live them
JustKittyKat 24
Basically, someone's gender or gender identity, does not affect whether I am attracted to them or not. I am as some say, "gender blind".
sammyjanette 17
Op, my little brother is gay, and he can NEVER tell my mother. Your father not only accepts you, but he can joke with you about it. Some people will never get that. You are beyond lucky.
noelasis94 18
Nothing like a father son chat young chap
jem970 19
At least your dad isnt screaming that he disownes you and never wants to see you again. A lot of my friends who experimented to really find out what they like got a lot worse treatment. Be thankful.
Inciter 33
It's good that he's being supportive of you! Just think positively.
kinky44 28
Haa... GAAAAAAAAAAAAY!