Today, a guy drove an hour and a half to get to where I live, only to literally last less than 30 seconds. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I drove over 3 hours to hook up with a guy I've been talking to for a couple of months. When we start having sex, he lasted less than a minute, and then couldn't get it up again afterwards. I slept uncomfortably the entire night on his twin bed while he snored. FML
Today, I drove three and a half hours to surprise my long distance boyfriend for our anniversary. He was out of town. Where was he? Three and a half hours away trying to surprise me. FML
Today, I drove an hour in a rainstorm to go see my boyfriend. Thirty minutes and a blow job later, he tells me he's going to meet some friends for dinner in half an hour then kicks me out of his house. It's still raining. FML
Today, a co-worker, who lives 30 minutes out of my way, had broken down so I picked him up. We were both 5 minutes late and both got fired. Our department takes 30-60 minutes to even start running. FML
Today, I hooked up with a guy. He didn't last 30 seconds before finishing, Then his car wouldn't start. I ended up walking home after a hook up that wasn't worth it. FML
Today, I had a surprise visitor at my place. A guy I was talking to a few months back. He said he was down my way getting gas and thought he’d stop by. He lives more than 45 minutes from my place, in the opposite direction, with about 20 gas stations between us. FML
Today, I drove 120 miles to spend a few days with my girlfriend. Less than 12 hours into my stay, she dumped me. FML
Today, I had to drive over an hour away to buy toilet paper. FML
Today, the guy that I've recently became close to texted me, wanting to hook up. He's very cute and I was definitely interested, so I agreed. The drive to his house lasted longer than the actual sex. He lives less than five minutes away. FML
Today, I woke up early for work and spent 30 minutes frantically looking for my keys. I had to take a 30-minute Uber ride to work, then drove an hour in the company truck, only to be stood up. FML
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Top comments
RichardPencil 32
Better than opening the door, having him say "Hard pass," and leaving.
Plop 17
Well, he wouldn't have driven an hour and a half if he hadn't been THAT thirsty. Pretty sure you guys could've gone for round 2 or even 3 to try and make it worthwhile. Anyway, in the end, it's more of an FML for him than for you (you're not the one who had to drive for 3 hours total for 30s of sex).
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Comments (7)
RichardPencil 32
Better than opening the door, having him say "Hard pass," and leaving.
jbuckets_404 39
In that case, a "hard pass" would be incorrect.
Plop 17
Well, he wouldn't have driven an hour and a half if he hadn't been THAT thirsty. Pretty sure you guys could've gone for round 2 or even 3 to try and make it worthwhile. Anyway, in the end, it's more of an FML for him than for you (you're not the one who had to drive for 3 hours total for 30s of sex).
Brightside86 31
Happens, people can be pretty nervous the first time with someone new.
jbuckets_404 39
Being nervous would make you soft, not premature.
Chazzster 32
So much for the “gift” of male virginity… But seriously most young guys are ready for round 2 in 20 minutes or so and that lasts longer. Never bring just one condom.
Plop 17
Neither his age nor level of experience are mentioned. For all we know he describes himself as a "stud" who's been with dozen of women (narrator's voice: without ever satisfying any of them).
CTscan 8
my first time I lasted for 3 hrs...
jbuckets_404 39
Not being able to find the correct orifice doesn't count. ;-)
phybreawptic 13
Save him in your phone as roller coaster.
noonereally 6
How rude. It should be taken as a compliment. The less time a guy lasts, usually that means he's more excited to be there. Give him another 20-30 min to recharge and he'll go again for longer.
Jason Lammers 4
He probably would have lasted longer the second round if you had tried again. He's probably super embarrassed about it, plus he had to drive all that way.