Today, I got my wisdom teeth cut out. While my girlfriend was driving me home, I, still being high on the laughing gas, accidentally admitted to cheating on her. She was kind enough to wait until the numbness wore off before she punched me in the face. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I got my wisdom teeth removed. My girlfriend had agreed to come over after and make sure I was okay, so I called her, saying I was done. She told me she'd made new plans, and to "just suck on a tampon, you pussy". FML
Today, I had all four of my wisdom teeth extracted. Under anesthesia I told the dentist my entire love life and drug history in detail. FML
Today, my girlfriend's ex punched me so hard in the face, I couldn't see straight. But I got up anyway. I lunged at him, and nailed him in the jaw. Turns out I'd in fact just knocked out my girlfriend the on-looker. FML
Today, I had all of my wisdom teeth removed. After the anesthesia wore off, I asked how long the procedure took, and the nurse told me a little less than an hour. Apparently I thought this was hilarious and started laughing, which ripped my new stitches. FML
Today, my girlfriend got her wisdom teeth removed. I really want to help her out while she recovers, but her swollen cheeks combined with her natural buck teeth keep making me crack up every time I see her. I can't help it and I'm now in the doghouse. FML
Today, I got my wisdom teeth out. Due to the drugs they gave me I felt nauseous. When I went to the bathroom as a precaution I did not throw up. Instead I passed out face first in the toilet. FML
Today, while my girlfriend and I were making out, she went to fix the pillow behind her head and punched me straight in the face. FML
Today, my girlfriend smashed a glass in my face. When I went to the hospital, the first thing the nurse did was ask what I did to upset her, and then muttered that she hoped I'd learned a lesson. FML
Today, in the middle of the night, I was punched in the face by my frightened girlfriend, who had just been awoken by her own fart. FML
Today, I confessed to cheating to my girlfriend. She decided to go up to the girl and ask her about it. The girl denied it and said she didn't even know me. My girlfriend walked up to me, called me a liar and punched me in the face. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
ohhjenn 0
you deserve it for being a cheater!
kcnutt10 1
**** YOUR life? No. YDI. You ******* douche! This may come as a shock to you, but women have feelings too. If you love or want to be with someone else, then just break-up with your girlfriend. It's that simple. Yea, it may cause her pain from the break-up, but not near as much pain if she realized you cheated on her. It's douche bags like you that make it hard for the few good men out there who actually respect women. Eat shit! I hope she dumped your sorry, pathetic ass.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (268)
stingray626 0
ok cheating is horrible nd all but saying he should die or hoping for death is harsh u just sound bitter
theian01 3
Reply system isn't working, that was to 24. As for the triple post, it wasn't showing up as a reply, so I'd post again. Sorry :-/
Acousticpixie14 6
Honestly, I think it's pretty ridiculous how almost every YDI post has been thumbed down into oblivion. There must be a lot of cheaters on FML. You should all be ashamed of yourselves. Sure, being punched after oral surgery must be atrocious, but he still deserved it. Cheaters never prosper [:
weissesengel 0
ydi for cheating. asshole
glen12 0
I'm sorry but dentists use anesthetic, not nitros oxide as a pain killer, and trust me, it's near impossible to get high off that stuff. when I got my wisdom teeth taken out, the dentist kept missing the nerve in my gums, shooting me up 11 times. my face was defiantly numb, but I wasn't high
Acousticpixie14 6
Some dentists double up. I had a procedure done on a chipped tooth with anesthesia and nitrous oxide. I think it just depends on the preferences of the dentist and the patient.
tjsomethin 9
Everyone asking about what Canadians have to do with this- I imagine you would have to be an avid watcher of South Park to understand.
Blackmail111 9
i hope she knocked all you teeth out you f***** time for another trip to the dentist
OneGirlsLife 20
He cheated on her he needs to be kicked in the balls!! She's not being abusive she only hit him one time!
0D0R0 4
He should cut her ******** off then.
skylarbee 8
... effects of laughing gas stop as soon as the laughing gas supply is turned off. so your just dumb.
Juliaa15 6
hahaha I agree. this made me laugh out loud, something fmls never do.