Today, my boyfriend and I were going to have sex for the first time. He didn't know how to take off my bra and insisted that he'd figure it out on his own. He gave up a couple of seconds later and played video games instead. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my boyfriend and I decided it was time to lose our virginity. After our clothes were removed, we spent 30 minutes trying to figure out how to actually have sex, and eventually gave up. FML
Today, I was getting intimate with my boyfriend for the first time. He was so nervous, he broke down in tears after failing to unclasp my bra after multiple fumbling attempts. Mood? Ruined. FML
Today, I tried to get my boyfriend's attention by taking my bra off and tossing it at him. He only put it on as a hat and kept playing his video games. FML
Today, was the first time I had sex with a guy I really like. I took off my shirt and my bra and he said "wow, that's disappointing." FML
Today, I had sex for the first time with my boyfriend. It was his first time too. While in bed, he blankly stopped and stood up and got out a piece of paper from his pocket. Turns out he'd written instructions on what to do while in bed, and forgot what he had to do next. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were in bed making out. He then tried to unhook my bra. After a full minute of trying unsuccessfully, he shouted "Fuck you, bra!" before hiding his face in the pillows. FML
Today, things got heated with my boyfriend for the first time. Turns out he's even more inexperienced than I thought; when I started grinding against him, he frowned and said, "Um... why're you doing that? We've still got clothes on..." FML
Today, I was messing with my boyfriend in my basement. We are both virgins and he wanted to perform oral sex on me for the first time. Naked, we finally decided to try to have sex. We discovered the act is much harder than it may seem. We're both still virgins. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were about to make love for the first time. The moment my bra came off, he started hyperventilating to the point of blacking out. So much for that. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I tried to have sex for the first time. Everything was going well, until he tried to put it in. A few minutes later, he said, "It's not hard enough." We tried for another half hour to fix that. We ended up eating ice cream. FML
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Top comments
Xquisite1 28
Sounds like someone is too young to even be considering sex.
schpanki 11
You just got bra blocked! Lesson learned - bras are evil.
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Comments (261)
ajmacrae 5
What happened to using the "snap"?!
jedielf 23
What kind of moron gives up on this shit? Most of those are just fricken hooks!
Zaffro 8
I never understood the problem with bras... But even so why on earth would he pass up sex for a computer game? Perhaps he was nervous, next time get naked walk in be forceful and ride him to death. After that if he still wants computer games over sex find a new boyfriend.
Zaffro 8
Or I'm the person that doesn't ignore a girl I'm with and actually spends time giving them attention. Plus I don't understand how a computer game could ever come close to sex.
itsaasif 3
Hey hii
seztacular 6
Take it off yourself, shake em around and when he wants to get it on, go play video games.
Mythicleb 0
Call me up I would have no issue
icadragoon 11
Try giving him a strip tease while he plays, if that doesn't work there's always a BJ. Just do it long enough where he doesn't cum, then he'll be begging for sex. There are plenty of books on how to satisfy a man, give one a read. But if you're too young to be having sex, pleasure yourself, the better you are at it the better your partner will be when you show him what turns you on.
laden_swallow09 35
Nuh-uh, Keevarou. I learned how to do it from books, magazines, internet articles, pornography, and even visited a museum dedicated to sex WELL before I did it for the first time, and I left her properly sated. She refused to believe me when I revealed that she was my first. In fact, her exact words were, "You can't be a virgin. You **** too good!" Now, Did you need to know that? No. Were you asking for it? Yes. Don't make a blanket statement like that when you know that it isn't the same for everybody. Books exist for a reason.
laden_swallow09 35
BTW, I thumbed up your post. :3
kaykay20 0
Huh what is wrong with a person giving their partner a ******* while they are playing a video game and when was privacy a issue during gaming? Never once heard of a guy let alone a gamer ever turning down a ******* from their horny girl nor demanding complete privacy while playing a video game.
perdix 31
He'd rather do something he's good at rather than something he stinks at doing. If you insist on having sex with this loser, you need to ratchet down your expectations and brace yourself for clumsy, awkward, irritating, rapid sex. Farts may come into play. If he sucks at video games, your next FML is pre-written . . . all you have to do is live it.
DeadxManxWalking 27
With you half naked behind him..
grapes1414 0
No one likes quitter ;)