Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. I was making a list of things to do tomorrow while faking an orgasm when I realize my boyfriend had finished about two minutes ago. He's pissed. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, while my boyfriend and I were having sex, I had my first orgasm. He thought something was wrong, so he stopped. FML
Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. As soon as I began to climax, he started repeatedly asking, "Are you done? Are you done yet? Are you done?" Well, NOW I am. Thanks, honey. FML
Today, I was having really great sex with my boyfriend. I was on top and he seemed like he was really enjoying it. Then, I realized he'd fallen asleep. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I got intimate. It was his first time, which I guess explains him sticking his hand down my panties and practically bitch-slapping my vagina for the next 20 or 30 seconds. I stupidly faked an orgasm just to get him to stop. Now he thinks he's some kind of sex god. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex, and he finished before me. I thought that he was going to try and get hard again so we could continue. Unfortunately, he turned to me and said to me, "Don't worry, I'll re-spawn in a few minutes." I lost it completely. FML
Today, I was having phone sex with my boyfriend. About halfway through he went really quiet and started breathing heavily. I thought he was about to climax until I discovered he had fallen asleep. FML
Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend, and I told him I was close to having an orgasm. He smirked and started talking like Yoda, saying, "Strong with the cum, this one is." Orgasm gone. FML
Today, while having sex with my boyfriend, I got so bored, I made a "to do" list for the week in my head. FML
Today, I was telling my boyfriend I had fake orgasms all the time to piss him off. He replied, "That's OK, I'm f***ing three other girls." FML
Today, my boyfriend was pleasuring me with his hands. After two years of being together, he was finally about to make me orgasm for the first time by himself. Just as I was reaching my peak, he orgasmed at the thought of finishing me off and stopped. FML
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Top comments
tippy_pink89 2
well ydi for faking, if he's not doing it right, tell him, how's he ever gonna learn n fyl for getting caught
paid2think 0
haha nice one
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Comments (261)
jjax107 0
if you're not gettin off then tell him...or either find good lover with sexier looks and a bigger dick on the side....your call
urielxxx 0
i heard this FML before you FAIL
loski87 4
lmao ydi how did you not notice?? you couldn't have been that engrossed in your thoughts.
RaIeigh 0
Ahaha this one of tha best FMLs ive read in awhile.. #61 - I dunno about that..to do lists are important business..while making one in my head once and walking in to work i actually ran straight into a plant and tha tip of it bent back and swatted my crotch pretty hard..sad part is i was looking straight at tha plant ..
xxrogerthatxx 19
not fckin funni dum bxtch.^^^^^^
Onkilla1988 1
FHL :D
raithex 0
You totally deserved that. You need to try and enjoy it, because even if it's bad, if you're faking an ****** and thinking of something else, they're gonna notice and be PISSED. So, you did it for not being a team player.
crowbar69 0
I agree with #33
aardvarkish 17
I just have one question for my Psychology exam tomorrow: WHY?
okieraider71 4
Why don't you just say "Let me show you what feels good to me....". I have never met a man who does not enjoy watching a woman make herself climax. And he will learn from it. When the two of you have sex and you have 3 or 4 orgasams, you will not be thinking of anything else.
bigi_sherman 0
fake fml. boooo
SpartanGoddess 0
FYL dude why didnt u pay attention... i mean even if ur fakin it u shud be able to feel it unless its jus that small n den i guess ur really F*uckd... cuz den u shud jus break up wit him