Today, I realized my girlfriend makes the same exact noises in bed and when she eats. I don't know if I'm a really good cook or a really bad lover. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I realized my boyfriend makes the same noises in bed as he does when he's winning in Call of Duty. FML
Today, I realized just how bad I am in bed when my girlfriend literally yawned the words, "Oh God" while attempting to fake an orgasm. FML
Today, my girlfriend started making pig noises during sex. FML
Today, I wanted to surprise my boyfriend by bringing him some dinner. He made the same noise unwrapping the burger that he does when he sees me naked. I'm not sure if that's a good or a bad thing. FML
Today, I said to my boyfriend that he makes the same noises when he smells bacon as he does when we have sex. Now everytime we have sex, he whispers "Bacon..." in my ear. FML
Today, while at Wendy's with my boyfriend, I realized that he made more pleasure sounds when eating his Baconator than he did while sleeping with me. FML
Today, as my girlfriend and I were making love, and she started to moan and groan. All of a sudden, she stopped and said, "I'm lying, you suck at this." FML
Today, after years in a relationship I realized that my partner does not like the music I listen to, the food I cook, the pictures I take, the way I dress. The only thing she likes is when I take her out to eat. FML
Today, I noticed that my girlfriend has a deeper voice than I do. FML
Today my girlfriend actually moved during sex. I love her, but she's so awful in bed. FML
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Top comments
iheartkanye 8
She wants the D... The chef boyardee.
Valdrek 26
It's good if she makes those noises during oral, means you are giving her something filing and satisfying
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Comments (78)
charvisioku 22
That would be because she'd be eating in both scenarios xD
U_GotitDude 18
How is that even possible?
dan_in_wi 12
you could also be a Shitty cook?
ItWasCool 7
You could be both...
emopoe 12
Is she fat? That would explain the food moaning.
SighGuy89 5
Are you sure it's your cooking? You should try eating out and then listen to the sounds she makes. heh
allie2590 31
They are lesbians, so they do that a lot already. :-P
saltycookies 5
They need to give the option to attach an audio file to go with the fml
MidnaLink 35
You're forgetting a picture option in most cases.
picturescrazy 24
Good lover, good cook!
razzledazzle21 23
Maybe she finds you and your food really yummy!
TheFirstSamurai 18
Does "Yum! Yum!" really sound like somebody is sexually aroused?