Today, I realized my girlfriend makes the same exact noises in bed and when she eats. I don't know if I'm a really good cook or a really bad lover. FML
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Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I realized my boyfriend makes the same noises in bed as he does when he's winning in Call of Duty. FML
Today, I realized just how bad I am in bed when my girlfriend literally yawned the words, "Oh God" while attempting to fake an orgasm. FML
Today, my girlfriend started making pig noises during sex. FML
Today, I wanted to surprise my boyfriend by bringing him some dinner. He made the same noise unwrapping the burger that he does when he sees me naked. I'm not sure if that's a good or a bad thing. FML
Today, I said to my boyfriend that he makes the same noises when he smells bacon as he does when we have sex. Now everytime we have sex, he whispers "Bacon..." in my ear. FML
Today, while at Wendy's with my boyfriend, I realized that he made more pleasure sounds when eating his Baconator than he did while sleeping with me. FML
Today, as my girlfriend and I were making love, and she started to moan and groan. All of a sudden, she stopped and said, "I'm lying, you suck at this." FML
Today, after years in a relationship I realized that my partner does not like the music I listen to, the food I cook, the pictures I take, the way I dress. The only thing she likes is when I take her out to eat. FML
Today, I noticed that my girlfriend has a deeper voice than I do. FML
Today my girlfriend actually moved during sex. I love her, but she's so awful in bed. FML
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Top comments
iheartkanye 8
She wants the D... The chef boyardee.
Valdrek 26
It's good if she makes those noises during oral, means you are giving her something filing and satisfying
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Comments (78)
deedoubles 6
Does this remind anyone about the Seinfeld episode where George is dating someone who makes orgasmic noises when she eats?
needsagf14 12
That's actually normal. They say the 2 basic human desires are food and sex, and they tend to react similarly to both, especially in the sounds they make.
friedbunnies 9
The two are one and the same.
peace_love_shit 7
You're probably a bad lover and a bad cook and she fakes both.
JPattonD 6
Maybe your love making is just delicious.
rabid_otaku 29
Or she's snacking on something every time you hump her.
BowlingCat 18
Once I was with my boyfriend and I realized he makes the same noises when he's licking off his plate after eating lasagna as when he's kissing my neck.
metroido 21
food is better than sex. period.