Today, at my job in a pub, I was cleaning the pub garden ready for closedown. There was a girl crouched on the floor under a table. By the time I'd realised what she was doing and turned around, she'd already finished, apologised, and left me to clean up her piss. FML
wtfamidoing98 tells us more.
Hi, OP here, When I walked out she was giggling like she was hiding from her friends as she was under a table. the disabled toilets is 10 steps away from the beer garden and the main loos are just up the stairs. I'm pretty sure "are you ******* kidding me" may have slipped out as she pulled her leggings up and ran away like a child. The wonders of some of the human race
Today, I found out that my boss, who had promised me a raise, is not promoting me. He says I don't have the right 'vibe' and I'm not 'relaxed' enough for the job. FML
Today, I got bitten at work. Not by a patient's mouth, but by the false teeth they were holding in their hand as they clamped down on my arm. FML
Today, I accidentally said, "Hell yes!" in front of a potential employer and a group of kids before an interview at a daycare center. FML
Today, my class and I were discussing our country's relationship with other countries. One person stated that the French have never done anything for us. A classmate took that moment to chime in and ask, "I thought the French gave us that giant statue of the Mona Lisa?" He was dead serious. FML
crazymentalblond tells us more.
OP here, when the second classmate made his announcement, everyone went silent (I swear crickets were chirping). He went into a ramble that sounded oddly like "the statue we got it in 1962." It took us all a few minutes to stifle our laughter to correct him. After that, yes someone did inform the first guy he was indeed wrong and told him several reasons why. At least it was a good way to kick off a what was slowly becoming a boring day. And yes I focused on the second guy a little bit more because I myself suck at history so I couldn't judge the first classmate too much. Especially when my previous schools skimmed over a lot of American history. If it wasn't for the books my mom showed me that she had on American history I wouldn't know much other than the basics. The education system I'm in really sucks.
Today, I was unsuccessful in getting a job at a supermarket. The same supermarket I used to work at. I now have a degree but can't even get a job at a place I used to work. FML
Today, upon applying for a new job to leave my old crappy job I was informed by my new potential employer that he was unable to hire me because he is friends with my current boss. FML
Today, I'm starting a new job. Only problem is, I haven't been told what my duties are, who my line manager is, or who to ask if I need help. FML
Today, I was complimented by my guests about the great of service I was giving them. They then left me a $2 tip on a $50 tab. FML
Today, I was given a building key that students aren't supposed to have because they'll lose it. I told my coach I wouldn't lose the key. The same key disappeared not even 20 minutes later without a trace. I still can't find it, and it's been an hour. FML
Today, my boss at my new job yelled at me for being 15 minutes early to work. Last week he yelled at me for being late for my shift when I arrived 5 minutes early. He's considering this my final warning before I'm fired. FML
Today, I was at work training for a new position. The girl who's been training me since I started decided to share about one of her tribe's proud, sacred traditions of eating raw, human flesh. I have another month shadowing her before I can work independently. I'm beyond disturbed. FML
Today, I was eating chicken noodle soup for my lunch. It was perfect until the last bite when it went down the wrong pipe. Choking, I coughed up what I'd already eaten. In front of my coworkers, and all over myself. FML
Today, I was taking a break in my work truck when I saw a huge swarm of bees flying my way. I have a hand crank window so I started cranking it up as fast as I could and the knob snapped off before it closed and I got stung by the whole swarm before I could get out. FML
Today, I sold cigarettes to a woman who promptly told me that she smoked meth. It's only my second night working this job. FML
Today, I saw an older gentleman running through my store. I wasn't sure why he was running towards the front door until I looked at the floor and saw a poop trail behind him. The trail went from the front of the store all the way to the back of the store. Guess who had to get the mop and bucket. FML
Today, my rather large boss told me how the company needs to save money, how we are going downhill fast, even suggesting that we might go bankrupt very soon. He then went on to ask me to go get him some very expensive scotch using the company credit card to, "help him cope with the stress." FML
Today, after complaining about the clocks still being an hour ahead from daylights savings, my work finally changed the time on all the clocks in the building. Now all the clocks are two hours ahead. FML
Today, I shaved my beard that I wanted to grow for winter, into a goatee for a Skype interview. On the day, the interviewer only used audio. FML
Today, while reading the newspaper, I noticed that an ad had been placed for my job. I asked my boss for a week off so that I could fly home for my father's funeral. No wonder she was so cool with it. FML
Today, my roommate told me that she was studying in the library. Turns out, she didn't feel like going to the library and just spent all afternoon studying in a friend's room because she didn't think I was capable of shutting up for long enough to get any work done. Our other friends agreed. FML
Today, I thought I was being a good worker by showing a mother and daughter several rooms before they settled on one. Turns out Mommy dearest only wanted a place for her brat to throw a party. The cops found alcohol, drugs, and guns. This from the people who complained about a loose chair arm. FML
naivemisanthrope tells us more.
Hi, OP here. I thought this was pretty straightforward, but since at less 111 people so far say otherwise. . . I work at a hotel. (Why would I be showing rooms of a house, much less mine?) We were slammed because of some game, and I was working 3-11, the busiest shift. This woman and her daughter came in, had a reservation for a double. They wanted to inspect the room first. I was busy, so I gave them a key and said I'd be by to check on them in 5 minutes. When I got to the room, they said they didn't like it. So I took them to pretty damn near every unoccupied double on the property, except the one already reserved for a regular. I did this because I had been told my customer service needs work. (And it does. I hate people. Hence the Misanthrope' part of my name.) So after finding something wrong with every room, they decided that they would go for the first room. Then, after I got them checked in, they came down an hour later to complain about a loose arm on the desk chair and asked to take a second look at another room. I practiced my robot-assassin smile and obliged. They decided not to move. I figured they would cause trouble, but the "this place is terrible, I want my money back, here's a bad review" trouble. Imagine my surprise when I showed up the next afternoon to learn that there had been a party, a fight, and a stabbing. The mother had rented her daughter a room for a party, and there was all kinds of illegal shit going on. A bunch of middle-class kids decided to play Fallout Raiders, I suppose. And the topper? They were locals. My hotel charges a steep deposit to locals to prevent just this. The mom had a fake ID from Florida, which means she knew about the policy and wanted to get around it. And this was after signing the paperwork with NO PARTIES in all caps, underlined, with the threat of fees and police. I had always thought the deposit policy was unfair--still do. But I see how it came to be. So, Ms. Cool Mom and Miss Brat wasted my time, wrecked a room, got fined, drove the deposit up even higher, and are facing legal charges. My only consolation is that they're worse off than I am. Every time I think I've encountered the worst of humanity, they surprise me (hence the 'naive' moniker). Oh, and the chair arm was never apprehended.
Today, a customer complained that one of our cashiers smiles too much. FML
Today, I went into work thinking it was my last day before I start my new job, as my 2-week notice said to the managers that I can't work after today. None of them believed that I was actually capable of getting a better job and thought my 2-week notice was a joke. FML
Today, as I was helping a customer, she asked if it was my first day and who was training me. Evidently, I'm bad at my job, because I've worked there for 7 months. FML
Today, at work, I had to explain to a customer that she can't connect her tablet to her home WiFi while she's at work. I went to MIT for this. FML
Today, I really didn't want to go to work. Still, I showed up for work early on the busiest night of the week and stayed back until past 10 p.m. Exhausted, I went to sign off the roster when I realised that, in fact, I was not rostered on for today at all. I'm on tomorrow, though. FML
Today, thanks to downsizing and corporate restructuring, I was "promoted" to the entry level position I had 10 years ago. FML
Today, I had to go to work on my day off to suspend someone. Afterwards, I got a call saying I can't suspend the person in question because the supervisor who told me to suspend them was wrong. FML
Today, I work as an assistant to a sculptor. We finished all our projects early so his wife decided to have me clean their kitchen. I wasn't paying attention and picked up a dead mouse. I screamed and threw it away as hard as I could. It hit their five-year-old son in the face. FML
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