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theawkwardlife

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theawkwardlife
  • Town/Country : CANADA BITCHZZ
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 19 May 1998 (15 years)
  • Number of visits : 1619
  • Number of comments : 88
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About theawkwardlife : Hi there! I'm Par from Canada. I love traveling by moose, I have a pet beaver & a leaf collection, I drink maple syrup and eat bacon with every meal and I live in an igloo with my polar bear friends. If you want to know more aboot me just message, eh? (No creeps please.)

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theawkwardlife's favorite FMLs

Today, I was trying on some shoes. As I was bending down, an old lady with a walking frame slowly approached. As she got close she whispered to me "Mmm, you've got a nice tushie." My girlfriend will not let me hear the end of it. FML

#20482645
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24608) - you deserved it (3089)

On 01/28/2013 at 3:14am - misc - by Creeped out (man) - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, after months of lacking intimacy in our relationship, my girlfriend decided to spice things up by covering her naked body with whipped cream. Except, we didn't have any in the fridge, so instead I had to politely lick shaving cream off of her while fighting the urge to vomit. FML

#20482358
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41956) - you deserved it (11609)

On 01/28/2013 at 12:03am - intimacy - by yourmainman (man) - Canada

Today, on my shift as a nurse, I asked a pregnant woman what she would name her child. She said she saw the name "Chlamydia" on a billboard and decided to name her daughter that, saying it was "beautiful." I informed her that it was an STD, and she replied, "Oh, well no one knows that!" FML

#20482313
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32726) - you deserved it (2097)

On 01/27/2013 at 11:36pm - kids - by andy (woman) - United States (California)

Today, after making love to my boyfriend for the first time, he shook my hand and said, "Good job." FML

#20481657
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36528) - you deserved it (7569)

On 01/27/2013 at 5:44pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Saskatchewan)

Today, I was on a ladder at work, fetching some stock from one of the storage shelves. Some teenage kid thought it would be fucking hilarious to grab the ladder and violently shake it. He hadn't bet on me being startled enough to fall off and fracture my elbow on the floor. FML

#20481589
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28434) - you deserved it (1785)

On 01/27/2013 at 4:59pm - health - by fucking teen cunts (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, at my cousin's birthday party, my grandma took me to one side, slipped me a pad, and started ranting that tampons "steal your virginity" and that I should never use them. Well, okay then. FML

#20481357
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24625) - you deserved it (1865)

On 01/27/2013 at 2:08pm - misc - by dynah114 (woman) - Israel (HaMerkaz)

Today, the rollercoaster I was on stuck upside down for a few minutes. I shat myself in terror. Then, gravity took effect. FML

#20480979
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36810) - you deserved it (8940)

On 01/27/2013 at 6:10am - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, during lunch, my coworker offered me her food, claiming she was full. I was still quite hungry, so I accepted it. Halfway through eating the sandwiches, my boss walked in and started interrogating people over who took his lunch. I quickly realized I was the one eating it. FML

#20479916
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30088) - you deserved it (3372)

On 01/26/2013 at 3:44pm - work - by FUCK THE PIGS (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was burgled while I was on the toilet. FML

#20402014
133 comments


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