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faerieonacid

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faerieonacid
  • Town/Country : The Netherlands
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 255
  • Number of comments : 1
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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faerieonacid's favorite FMLs

Today, when I got home, my child had three bruises. My babysitter's excuse? "She hit me first". FML

#20538066
196 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46879) - you deserved it (5856)

On 03/10/2013 at 12:08pm - kids - by Amanda - Canada

Today, I fell down the stairs. Lying on my back in extreme pain, I called my mom for help. When she came over, she said I looked like a dead bug, took a picture and posted it on Facebook. FML

#20118333
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20939) - you deserved it (1899)

On 10/15/2012 at 5:38pm - health - by Bug (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my crush grabbed my butt while I was walking up the stairs. In surprise I farted. He won't even look me in the eyes now. FML

#18811404
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27432) - you deserved it (6186)

On 01/15/2012 at 12:58am - misc - by anonymous - United States

Today, I went over to a guy's house for dinner. He ended up getting really drunk and started crying, telling me that I reminded him of his dead ferret. Distraught, he tearfully showed me her ashes. FML

#16271317
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32393) - you deserved it (4487)

On 05/20/2011 at 7:33pm - misc - by SophieGray - United States (New York)

Today, I was at a petting zoo with my boyfriend. A guy that worked there said he'd take a picture of me with a mouse on my head. He reassured me that this mouse was trained. I agreed. Once the mouse got on my head, it peed. Turns out the guy didn't work there after all. FML

#6212555
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22354) - you deserved it (13026)

On 11/08/2009 at 2:14pm - health - by Poopyhead (woman) - Ireland (Cork)

Today, I found out why my boyfriend gets so upset when I make jokes about him and his best guy friend being lovers. It's because they are. FML

#4426507
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61333) - you deserved it (8158)

On 08/10/2009 at 12:31pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, two of my girlfriends and I went to a bar. The only action any of us got was a 50 year old man who came up and handed us "An origami vagina for the pretty ladies." FML

#2463557
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39788) - you deserved it (4545)

On 05/31/2009 at 12:46pm - misc - by ailat0107 (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my friend had to take my cat who has a tumor to be put down when I wasn't home since I couldn't bare to take him myself. I have two cats. He took the wrong one. FML

#1815627
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (397916) - you deserved it (52929)

On 05/10/2009 at 3:01pm - animals - by catlady (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I found out that I'm pregnant. My husband and I have been trying to have a baby for a while, and I was very excited to tell him the news. When I opened his office planning to surprise him with the news, I saw him making out with a man. FML

#1104891
400 comments

I agree, your life sucks (449029) - you deserved it (25562)

On 04/19/2009 at 12:05am - intimacy - by soontobedivorced (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I took the bus to work. A sweet old lady got on after and sat next to me. Halfway there, she fell asleep, her head on my shoulder. I gently tried to wake her up before my stop. She wasn't sleeping. I let a dead woman lie on me for 30 minutes. FML

#960425
663 comments

I agree, your life sucks (655989) - you deserved it (48816)

On 04/13/2009 at 10:11pm - health - by meteorbabe0101 (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, my tampon string was hanging from my bathing suit. My boyfriend thought it was a thread hanging from my bikini bottom. He publicly pulled out my tampon. FML

#784043
449 comments

I agree, your life sucks (384905) - you deserved it (61669)

On 04/03/2009 at 3:39pm - misc - by rebekah (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)



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