brewmasterg

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brewmasterg

18Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Monday 30 December 1991 (24 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 15045
  • Number of comments : 164
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

About brewmasterg : www.atlastheaussie.tumblr.com
www.facebook.com/atlasaussie

brewmasterg's page activity

Visits<b>superwhovian</b> - the 06/24/2016 at 9:28pm<b>Lepisma</b> - the 06/24/2016 at 8:10pm<b>emeraldkat</b> - the 06/23/2016 at 12:16am<b>angrykid11</b> - the 06/08/2016 at 5:12pm<b>Draysor</b> - the 06/06/2016 at 2:44am<b>Rababco</b> - the 05/30/2016 at 5:07pm<b>atlien247</b> - the 05/25/2016 at 2:39pm<b>cakester123</b> - the 05/08/2016 at 1:38pm<b>VictoriaT519</b> - the 05/06/2016 at 7:09pm<b>OmgimBored</b> - the 05/05/2016 at 4:15pm<b>Mmorpheus</b> - the 05/05/2016 at 7:32am<b>phantomxbg</b> - the 05/04/2016 at 11:30pm<b>ssnow</b> - the 05/02/2016 at 8:43am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 05/01/2016 at 11:07pm<b>Lolipop2241030</b> - the 05/01/2016 at 10:07pm<b>Willman757</b> - the 04/30/2016 at 7:50pm<b>assassin29876</b> - the 04/24/2016 at 11:12pm<b>waleedma</b> - the 03/28/2016 at 3:24pm

Fucked!<b>ssnow</b> - the 05/02/2016 at 2:43pm<b>infantrysoldier</b> - the 01/30/2016 at 7:32pm<b>cuculagirl</b> - the 07/21/2015 at 6:04pm<b>apcsox</b> - the 07/20/2015 at 9:06pm<b>chuchusheep</b> - the 07/20/2015 at 4:34pm<b>crazy_loner</b> - the 07/20/2015 at 3:05pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 07/20/2015 at 1:00pm<b>HarshD9619</b> - the 04/12/2015 at 7:30pm<b>martin8337</b> - the 04/01/2015 at 9:26am<b>Steve95401</b> - the 03/30/2015 at 7:47am<b>EmsyyyRose13</b> - the 03/18/2015 at 8:55pm<b>a_nice_guy</b> - the 03/18/2015 at 2:52pm<b>Mukuro</b> - the 03/10/2015 at 6:39pm<b>DoomSkuller</b> - the 02/11/2015 at 7:18am<b>Tarlachia</b> - the 01/31/2015 at 10:29pm<b>S232Flash</b> - the 01/24/2015 at 6:31pm<b>Hamlet1971</b> - the 01/11/2015 at 3:07pm<b>ViperSe</b> - the 12/31/2014 at 7:30am

brewmasterg's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

What'cha looking at?

You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.

See all of brewmasterg's badges

brewmasterg's favorite FMLs

Today, it's my wedding day. I have a cold sore that makes me look like The Joker. Make-up won't cover it and the emergency medicine my doctor gave me only irritates it more. My future husband asks, "Why so serious?" and laughs whenever he sees me. Fantastic. FML

by sharibaby / 04/30/2013 at 5:26pm / United States (Colorado) / Miscellaneous

Today, my psycho and now ex-girlfriend accused me of cheating on her with my own mother. FML

by Anonymous / 04/27/2013 at 2:32pm / Lithuania (Kauno Apskritis) / Love

Today, at work at a farm, we got a new calf. It looked like it had to poop, but was having difficulty. About four hours later it still hadn't pooped. Turns out it was born without an actual butthole. It was there, just sealed up by skin. I literally had to cut this poor calf a new butthole. FML

by halliemarie1818 / 04/23/2013 at 10:01pm / United States / Animals

Today, my girlfriend from high school contacted me, telling me we should hang out some time; I casually agreed. Two hours later she's on my doorstep in tears, wanting me to take her back. She's married with kids. I live four states away and haven't a clue how she found out where I live. FML

by Anonymous / 04/21/2013 at 7:26pm / United States / Love

Today, my grandmother tried to upstage me at my wedding by wearing an actual wedding dress because she "never had a real wedding". FML

by gamerguru13 / 04/21/2013 at 8:26am / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went on my first date. Everything went great until I went to brush my date's hair over her ear like they do in the movies. I poked her dead in the eye. FML

by Anonymous / 04/19/2013 at 10:55pm / United States (Connecticut) / Miscellaneous

Today, I walked in on my 12-year-old daughter lying on her bed, repeatedly opening and closing her legs. I asked her what she was doing, and she replied, "Trying to queef. I saw it online." FML

by reyoflight / 04/19/2013 at 6:04pm / Brazil (Rio de Janeiro) / Kids

Today, I dressed up as Batman for a comic book convention. I was hit by a car on the way there by a man dressed up as the Joker for the same convention. FML

by ironies a b*tch / 04/13/2013 at 1:04am / United States (Illinois) / Transportation

Today, my boyfriend of 2 weeks said that he was going to cook me dinner. After waiting for the frozen pizza that he decided to make for me to be completely cooked, he said, "Oh I hate this part", reached into the oven with his bare hands and took out the pizza, all while screaming. He is 24. FML

by Anonymous / 04/11/2013 at 11:42am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, at work as a gynecologist, I called in my last patient of the day. As soon as I took a peek, I noticed that she had stuck googly-eyes above her vagina. She told me with a straight face not to be afraid, because "She doesn't bite." FML

by Anonymous / 04/09/2013 at 2:01pm / United States / Health

Today, I had to get my grandparents out of jail, because they were caught having sex in a public place. They excused their actions by saying that you can only be young and stupid once, so if you continue doing stupid actions, you are still young. FML

by MrKento / 04/08/2013 at 7:16pm / Honduras (Francisco Morazan) / Intimacy

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, while walking to my car after work, I witnessed some moron who was texting while riding her bike running right into my parked car, resulting in a broken side mirror, a damaged windshield, two dents, and for her, a broken phone and nose. She's threatening to sue me for damages. FML

by Anon / 04/08/2013 at 6:04pm / United States (Ohio) / Transportation

Today, I picked my 12-year-old daughter up from school after her first sexual education lecture. She burst into tears on the way home explaining her fears of being pregnant with her boyfriend's child. As if that doesn't sound bad enough, I've met her boyfriend before. He is imaginary. FML

by anonymous / 04/04/2013 at 6:52pm / United States (California) / Kids

Today, my little sister figured out how to use the printer. I came home to pictures of Nicolas Cage all over my room. FML

by Anonymous / 04/02/2013 at 5:22am / United States (New York) / Kids

Today, a blonde tourist came up to me and asked me for directions to the nearest train station. I politely directed her there, and she left. Five minutes later, she came back and slapped me for not bringing her to an "English-speaking station". We're in China, lady. FML

by dumb tourists / 03/31/2013 at 2:19am / China (Beijing) / Miscellaneous