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Todeswalzer

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Todeswalzer
  • Town/Country : Cologne, Germany
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Saturday 5 October 1985 (28 years)
  • Number of visits : 710
  • Number of comments : 24
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About Todeswalzer : Great Guy

Todeswalzer's last visitors

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Todeswalzer's FML badges

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

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Todeswalzer's favorite FMLs

Today, I realized that the "holla" tattoo I stupidly got on my lower lip five years ago isn't fading as I expected it to, and will probably contribute to my unemployment for years to come. FML

#19376711
277 comments

I agree, your life sucks (4854) - you deserved it (61336)

On 03/30/2012 at 3:13pm - work - by bananamuffin - United States

Today, I went down on my girlfriend for the first time. Let's just say pubes and toilet paper residue were the least of my problems. FML

#19330918
322 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43687) - you deserved it (4210)

On 03/23/2012 at 1:55am - intimacy - by mrricecakes (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, while driving home from school, I noticed one of our hot quarterbacks in the car behind me. Trying to impress him, I pulled into the driveway of an expensive-looking house. To my horror, he pulled in behind me and asked what I was doing at his house. FML

#19320311
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9554) - you deserved it (59514)

On 03/21/2012 at 1:12pm - kids - by brooke (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I was at a concert and a man came up behind and started to grind me. I pushed him away. He came back and pissed on my leg. FML

#19315463
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23925) - you deserved it (2811)

On 03/20/2012 at 6:27pm - misc - by Laura - United Kingdom (South Ayrshire)

Today, I went to Hooters for lunch. My food was brought to me by a man. FML

#19288594
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20801) - you deserved it (12870)

On 03/16/2012 at 1:00pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, my mom was freaking out about me handling a CD-ROM with my bare hands. When I asked her what all the commotion was about, she said she was worried that I would catch "one of those computer viruses" she'd heard about on the news. FML

#18974920
215 comments

Today, my parents boarded the fad wagon and became Juggalos. FML

#18891757
244 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20730) - you deserved it (2594)

On 01/23/2012 at 5:33pm - misc - by unholy shit (man) - United States

Today, my kids tried to make grilled cheese by turning the toaster sideways. When all was done, it all flew out onto the kitchen floor. Both my kids and my husband left the mess there for me to clean up when I got home. FML

#18891516
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20737) - you deserved it (2635)

On 01/23/2012 at 5:07pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, while I was getting ready to take a shower, I placed my phone on the counter next to the toilet. While I was washing my hair, someone called me. My phone was on vibrate, so I didn't hear it until it vibrated off the counter and into the toilet. FML

#18881874
256 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14143) - you deserved it (24702)

On 01/22/2012 at 5:03pm - misc - by needanewphone - United States (Illinois)

Today, my father introduced me to his new girlfriend. She could have passed for my little sister, or even worse, my daughter. FML

#18881598
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28266) - you deserved it (2097)

On 01/22/2012 at 4:26pm - love - by Laura (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my boyfriend and I shared our first kiss. When I leaned in on him, he fell over backwards and smashed his head against the floor. FML

#18880094
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20563) - you deserved it (3210)

On 01/22/2012 at 1:06pm - love - by Anonymous - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I woke up to the sound of a Suburban crashing through my fence and striking the tree in my front yard. After filling out the police report, the driver repeatedly asked me to give him a lift to work. He seemed confused by my speechlessness. FML

#18880054
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18571) - you deserved it (1404)

On 01/22/2012 at 12:57pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Nevada)

Today, I noticed a man in my neighborhood waving at me. I don't talk to him often so I excitedly waved back. Turns out he was trying to warn me of the car about to hit me. FML

#18878562
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23535) - you deserved it (3761)

On 01/22/2012 at 9:17am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I caught myself thinking about what to cook for dinner tonight. During sex. FML

#18878139
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23440) - you deserved it (6130)

On 01/22/2012 at 6:44am - intimacy - by Anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my recent ex-girlfriend posted a photo of herself on Facebook. It was a picture of herself in the arms of a half-naked male stripper. She posted it on my wall. FML

#18877694
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25844) - you deserved it (4335)

On 01/22/2012 at 4:12am - love - by sisco2901 (man) - Slovakia (Nitra)



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