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Today, I was at Target with my mom. After 10 minutes of my mom walking around looking confused, I said, "Mom, what are you looking for? I worked at this place for 4 years, I know where everything is." My mom was looking for KY. FML

by kallens / 01/15/2009 at 6:08pm / United States (Minnesota) / Miscellaneous

Today, I decided to upgrade to Windows 10. I wanted to keep my old files on the current hard drive, I clicked on the keep old files option. Thanks to Windows, I lost everything. FML

by Arrkyna / 08/23/2015 at 1:42pm / Miscellaneous

Today, one of my friends thought it would be funny to tell my psycho clinger of an ex that I still like her. It had only been a few months since she finally stopped stalking me. FML

by Anonymous / 11/11/2015 at 3:51am / Australia (Victoria) / Miscellaneous

Today, I deleted a load of junk that was messing up my mother's computer. I don't know how I'm going to tell her I accidentally wiped out all of her wedding photos. FML

by not living happily ever after / 12/02/2014 at 12:02pm / United States (Virginia) / Geek

Today, I was verbally and physically attacked in a public pool, because I was swimming in what a grandma claimed was her part of the pool. Since I'm a very tolerant person, I calmly tried to talk some reason into the elderly lady. The lifeguard had to come to protect me. FML

by Anonymous / 11/30/2015 at 6:54pm / Belgium (Oost-Vlaanderen) / Health

Today, while out to lunch, my sister called me and asked me to pick her up from the mall. I told her she'd have to wait. She got pissed off and started cursing at me, so I hung up on her. She called me back 37 times until I answered and yelled "WILL YOU LEAVE ME THE FUCK ALONE?" It was my boss. FML

by jacks_smirking_revenge / 03/06/2009 at 5:31pm / United States (California) / Work

Today, I started a new job at a family owned business. About ten minutes in to training, the mother and father started an argument that ended in each of them storming off, demanding a divorce. FML

by TordNorski / 10/02/2015 at 10:44pm / United States (California) / Work

Today, my football practice ended early due to severe weather. Not only had I misplaced my phone earlier in the day, both my parents thought the other had picked me up. I was in the rain for an hour and a half. FML

by pi_power_15 / 08/10/2015 at 11:25pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous

Today, I realized that the only things I gained from my masters programs are more debt and the knowledge that you can use a semicolon in a list. FML

by Anonymous / 02/19/2010 at 7:03am / United States (Virginia) / Miscellaneous

Today, I walked into the house only to be greeted by the strongest smell of dung. I asked my mom about it, and it turns out she's been airing these strange herbs throughout the house, most of which are in my bedroom. She won't let me open the window. FML

by whyme / 02/07/2012 at 1:38am / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, I've been forced to start packing to go on a vacation with my parents, because they say I've been studying too hard and need a break. I've hardly studied at all and was planning on making up for it all in the time I had left before finals. I'm screwed. FML

by goodbye cruel world / 02/23/2014 at 2:00pm / United States (North Carolina) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had a dream where I was giving Justin Bieber a blowjob. I'm a totally straight male. I have half a mind to bill the little bastard for therapy sessions. FML

by honk honk, fuckwad / 11/06/2015 at 5:39pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was leaning over a fence in a pasture to get a closer look at something. Nobody warned my nuts that it was an electric fence. FML

by Anonymous / 03/27/2012 at 1:52am / United States (Oklahoma) / Miscellaneous