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Today, at the beach, my boyfriend picked me up and carried me over his shoulder. I felt my bikini top come undone in the process. I panicked and pulled down on his shorts. We were fined for indecent exposure. FML

#19757535
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25000) - you deserved it (9809)

On 06/08/2012 at 10:36pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, my boyfriend decided to piss in the shower while I was standing next to him. I did not mind, until I realised the water flows away incredibly slowly. I had to stand in his piss while the shower filled itself with the sweet odor of fresh urine. FML

Today, I had surgery on my arm. My mom has recently had the same surgery and my dad is having his first rib removed and won't be able to move his arm. My family combined now has three functioning arms. FML

#20142449
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25001) - you deserved it (1749)

On 11/01/2012 at 1:08am - health - by Anonymous - United States (Arizona)

Today, my girlfriend and I were going through some troubles in our relationship, and she said to me, "No offense, but I really hope no other relationship I have in the future will be like this one." Some offense taken. FML

#20141147
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24999) - you deserved it (2988)

On 10/31/2012 at 12:22am - love - by anon (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I told my mom about the severe phobia I've developed towards driving. She was very supportive and even made me an appointment to see a psychologist. His office is two hours away. I have to drive to see my doctor about my fear of driving. FML

#19956535
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24998) - you deserved it (3239)

On 07/18/2012 at 9:29pm - health - by anonymous - United States

Today, I had to take a dump in a box for a stool test. FML

#15430583
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24999) - you deserved it (12652)

On 03/22/2011 at 11:39am - health - by Maddie -

Today, I discovered that nothing kills a wet dream faster than a kitten who pounces on things that wiggle under the blanket. FML

#5903153
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24998) - you deserved it (3983)

On 10/19/2009 at 8:43pm - intimacy - by JohnB (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I received a parking fine for $147. My car isn't even worth that much. FML

#19045980
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24996) - you deserved it (7405)

On 02/11/2012 at 2:03am - money - by jam - Australia

Today, I was diagnosed with pneumonia. My breathing is short and heavy, and I wanted my boyfriend to comfort me. Instead, he called me Darth Vader, patted me on the head, and said, "Don't worry, the Force will be with you." FML

#20192329
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24995) - you deserved it (4130)

On 12/05/2012 at 12:55pm - health - by Emily - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I was walking through town when I saw a plastic bag on the ground. Trying to be a good citizen, I picked it up, intending on throwing it in the trash. When I looked up, there wasn't a trash can for another hundred feet. So I put it back down. Now I've got a $200 fine to pay for littering. FML

#1303608
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24994) - you deserved it (58485)

On 04/24/2009 at 9:55pm - misc - by fml (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I was waiting for a call from a job I had applied for. When the phone rang, I ran as fast I could up the stairs, falling and slamming my shin on the way. The call? It was a woman asking me, "Hi, do you have time to learn about our lord Jesus Christ?" FML

#19324398
23 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24993) - you deserved it (5402)

On 03/22/2012 at 12:56am - work - by Atheist (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I was eating a meatball sub when a meatball fell out and rolled into my hair and all down my shirt. I couldn't find the missing meatball anywhere. I found it later, in my handbag. FML

#19179734
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24993) - you deserved it (4280)

On 02/28/2012 at 12:19am - misc - by malloreigh (woman) - Australia

Today, my girlfriend decided it would be cute to leave a love letter in my car while I was at work. She left my lights on. I got a dead battery. FML

#20179747
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24992) - you deserved it (2482)

On 11/26/2012 at 1:59pm - love - by Blake Lawrence - United States (Utah)



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