Today, I took a nap, and I had a dream that my ex-girlfriend got back together with me. I woke up in a great mood. When I went back to bed, I dreamed that she broke up with me, again. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26562) - you deserved it (3231)
On 05/18/2013 at 1:22am - love - by Sarsippius -
Today, I woke up to my dad emptying a water bottle on my head, because I needed to "get up for school" or I'd be late. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25246) - you deserved it (19243)
On 05/14/2013 at 7:13am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)
Today, I was on a date with this guy I just met and we went to a fancy restaurant. Halfway through the meal, there was an awkward silence, and he decided to end it by saying "You know, you chew like a cow." FML
I agree, your life sucks (25018) - you deserved it (6791)
On 05/17/2013 at 10:59pm - love - by moo... -
Today, my girlfriend and I were about to have sex for the first time when her mother unexpectedly came home. In the rush to get dressed, we accidentally put on each other's shirts. Her mom noticed. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22905) - you deserved it (7933)
On 05/18/2013 at 8:54am - intimacy - by lez probs - United States
Today, my girlfriend dumped me because she apparently saw me making out with her sister. She doesn't even have a sister. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20712) - you deserved it (1580)
On 05/18/2013 at 3:34pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I went for an interview regarding a seasonal position I'd been offered at a grocery store. The manager showed up 45 minutes past the scheduled interview time, cheerfully greeted me, and took me back to his office, just to tell me that they don't hire seasonal help. Ever. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20208) - you deserved it (1492)
On 05/18/2013 at 4:36pm - work - by ineedayob (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I got my third promotion at work in as many years. My husband congratulated me very briefly, before asking if this meant he no longer had to look for a job. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19241) - you deserved it (2069)
On 05/18/2013 at 3:27pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - Mexico (Guanajuato)
Today, I brought my girlfriend home for the first time. I was really excited to introduce her to my parents, until we found my mother waving around a wooden sword, and my father trying to shove my sister into the dryer. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19108) - you deserved it (1767)
On 05/18/2013 at 4:06pm - love - by Mr_poole (man) - United States (Colorado)
Today, I spent hours debating with a lady who claimed she'd spent years "studying the big bang theory". Not only did she not know the scientific meaning of the word "theory", her killer argument was "If the big bang happened, where are the fossils?" I'm not sure whether or not I just got trolled. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17618) - you deserved it (2312)
On 05/18/2013 at 2:44pm - misc - by look at the fucking universe, lady (man) - United States (Alabama)
Today, I got a tattoo of the snake and staff medical symbol on my wrist. Now everyone keeps asking what illness I have; they think it's a medical bracelet substitute. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16079) - you deserved it (28346)
On 05/16/2013 at 11:01am - misc - by Calaraphea (woman) - United Kingdom (Warrington)
Today, while at hospital with a broken arm, I was asked to raise my hand onto the x-ray machine. I told the nurse I couldn't move it without extreme pain. She told me to suck it up, picked up my arm, and dropped it on the machine. I could feel the bone completely separate. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7045) - you deserved it (369)
On 05/18/2013 at 7:15pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Arizona)
Today, I told my dad that I broke up with my first serious girlfriend. He responded by blaring sad breakup songs as loud as he could throughout the house, just to see me "cry like a bitch". FML
I agree, your life sucks (4884) - you deserved it (676)
On 05/18/2013 at 6:33pm - love - by SteroidPenguin (man) - United States (Colorado)
Today, I was roasting marshmallows around a campfire when mine burst into flames. I instinctively shook the stick to get it to go out. The flaming marshmallow then catapulted straight into my eye, burning my whole eyelid. FML
I agree, your life sucks (3981) - you deserved it (1504)
On 05/19/2013 at 1:26am - misc - by Devin - United States
Wednesday 15 May 2013
The website: FML t-shirts -
Love - Animals - Money - Kids - Work - Health - Intimacy - Miscellaneous - Members
RSS feeds: 
Follow the FML Follow the FML blog 
Follow the FML comments
Go on the road: BlackBerry - Android - iPhone/iPod Touch - Windows Phone 7 - Mobile version
Give stuff to people: FML book - FML t-shirts
FML Everywhere: Français - Italiano - Español - Türk - Pусский - Svenskt - Indonesia
