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Sunday 31 March 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, a customer came up to me and asked if I knew where the make-up aisle was. I pointed him in the right direction but he just gasped and said, "Oh so you DO know where it is!" and walked away, roaring with laughter. FML

#20562040
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31283) - you deserved it (3127)

On 03/27/2013 at 3:29am - work - by apparentlytoougly (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my washing machine broke down, within its warranty. I asked my neighbour if she could open the door for the mechanic while I was at work; she agreed. When I came home, I had a bill for 80 bucks for not opening the door. Her reason? She was busy watching her favorite TV show. FML

#20573502
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30968) - you deserved it (4478)

On 04/03/2013 at 5:40pm - money - by Jack -

Today, while in a public bathroom, I threw out my back. A stranger had to help me pull up my pants. FML

#20563612
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30784) - you deserved it (2230)

On 03/28/2013 at 9:52am - health - by paulinapo - United States (New York)

Today, I found out that the money that my wife claims went into repairing her car engine actually is going towards helping her pay for a divorce. FML

#20564887
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30697) - you deserved it (2007)

On 03/29/2013 at 1:37am - love - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I was buying condoms at Walmart. I grabbed the XL size, and the cashier commented, "Ahh, you'll definitely need a smaller size." FML

#20573161
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30654) - you deserved it (13510)

On 04/03/2013 at 12:57pm - misc - by nottoosmall - United States

Today, I woke up to my husband taking a piss on our bedroom floor. I screamed that he wasn't in the bathroom, to which he responded, "Shut up! I'm taking a piss, let me finish!" He has no recollection of the event. Now I have to clean up his piss and rewash my clothes. FML

Today, I was feeling down following a recent breakup. My dad tried to comfort me by patting me on the back and saying everyone goes through ups and downs, "Like when I found out your mum and I were having a boy." I'm their only son. FML

#20565847
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30557) - you deserved it (2308)

On 03/29/2013 at 6:18pm - misc - by Appelflap (man) - Belgium (Oost-Vlaanderen)

Today, my daughter got selected to pick music for a funeral. She only listens to Nikki Minaj. FML

#20560709
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30357) - you deserved it (3621)

On 03/26/2013 at 7:40am - kids - by bear - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I was on a bumpy bus ride and had to write a note, so I held my notebook against the bus window to steady my hand. An elderly woman then yelled at me, accusing me of drawing graffiti on the window. The bus driver kicked me off and I had to wait an hour in the rain for the next bus. FML

#20561950
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30347) - you deserved it (2378)

On 03/27/2013 at 1:41am - misc - by 00sasori - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my little sister figured out how to use the printer. I came home to pictures of Nicolas Cage all over my room. FML

#20571278
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30344) - you deserved it (4982)

On 04/02/2013 at 5:22am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, I interviewed three elderly residents at a nursing home, hoping to use the transcript for a very important paper due next week. It went great, so I wrapped up and drove home. I sat down to start typing, and realized that my recording had stopped ten minutes in. FML

#20577861
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30237) - you deserved it (5259)

On 04/06/2013 at 5:39pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was driving home from a friend's house after a night of partying. Suddenly, I had to poop worse than I ever had to in my entire life. The pain was so bad I had to pull over and pretend to be checking my tires while I let out the entire contents of my bowels onto the road. FML

#20579905
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30233) - you deserved it (6122)

On 04/07/2013 at 9:47pm - health - by poopy pants - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I went to get my car fixed. There was a vending machine in the waiting room, and I was hungry. The snacks were overpriced, but I still had a little money left over. I noticed a bag of Cheetos hanging loose, so I paid for them, hoping to get two bags. They both got stuck. FML

#20576079
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30138) - you deserved it (8079)

On 04/05/2013 at 12:34pm - money - by Z'ev - United States (New York)



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