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Wednesday 6 March 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I woke to find my laptop and printer covered in what smells like pee. My boyfriend then confessed to me that he occasionally "sleep-pees". It's like sleepwalking, but where he urinates on random objects. FML

#20538947
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32566) - you deserved it (2591)

On 03/11/2013 at 12:09am - misc - by marcymoo - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, my neighbour's puppy has developed separation anxiety. Every time my neighbour leaves for work, the puppy constantly whines and barks until he gets home. He works night shifts. FML

#20532315
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32379) - you deserved it (2147)

On 03/05/2013 at 2:58pm - animals - by sotired - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I finally got the courage to confess my feelings to the guy I have loved for a year now in a long note. He called half an hour later and said, "I'm not going to read this crap, just tell me what it says". FML

#20535268
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32182) - you deserved it (7369)

On 03/07/2013 at 10:53pm - love - by hoolabaloo (woman) - India (Gujarat)

Today, I finally told my dad about how I've been diagnosed with clinical depression. He began to recite a commercial for depression meds, but he couldn't finish because he was overwhelmed with laughter. FML

#20537428
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32169) - you deserved it (3638)

On 03/09/2013 at 9:05pm - misc - by depressed - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I went to the movies with my boyfriend. The movie was in 3D, and he couldn't help but notice it would be much cooler if you could feel what the characters did. He spent the next two hours slapping me every time the person in the movie did, claiming the movie would be "better". FML

#20542280
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32146) - you deserved it (5785)

On 03/13/2013 at 5:06pm - misc - by bruised - Canada (New Brunswick)

Today, I bought a textbook for my college class. Not only is the £150 book only sold by our teacher, it turned out to be a piece of shit that he obviously wrote, printed, and stapled together at home. When I went to the faculty about it, I was told it's all perfectly legal, and to drop it. FML

#20535847
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32095) - you deserved it (2703)

On 03/08/2013 at 1:44pm - money - by defrauded (woman) - United Kingdom (Argyll and Bute)

Today, while working, I thought, "I wish my kittens could text so I can talk to them throughout the day." And then I realized, I'm that cat lady you read about. FML

#20532138
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32050) - you deserved it (12567)

On 03/05/2013 at 11:13am - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Vermont)

Today, I tried to pick up a girl by asking her what the time was as a conversation starter. She responded by telling me it was time to pick a girl more in my league. FML

#20537800
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31911) - you deserved it (8440)

On 03/10/2013 at 3:52am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I moved back to my home town. My best friend and I had arranged to rent a house together that we both liked. I finished my last day at work and made the three-hour drive, only for her to break down and tell me that she isn't "ready" to move out of her parents' basement. She's 25. FML

#20540831
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31565) - you deserved it (2556)

On 03/12/2013 at 2:35pm - misc - by Hopelesshomeless (woman) - United States (Iowa)

Today, I took my daughter on her first visit to the zoo. While we were watching the lemurs, some kid thought it would be funny to start shouting "MONKEY CUNTS" at them at the top of his voice. Now my daughter refuses to stop repeating the same phrase. FML

#20540639
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31189) - you deserved it (2803)

On 03/12/2013 at 10:05am - animals - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, a man I once worked with passed away. He was a lovely, caring, and inspirational person whom I looked up to. My husband's form of consolation? "Old people die. Get over it." FML

#20538776
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30895) - you deserved it (3579)

On 03/10/2013 at 10:47pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, instead of actually teaching us something, our college professor excitedly showed us the godawful Harlem Shake video he made with his friends. FML

#20533295
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30690) - you deserved it (4446)

On 03/06/2013 at 6:51am - work - by Will this stupid fad ever end? (man) - United States

Today, I told my mom about the rough time I'm having over my recent break-up, and how I can't help thinking about my ex every single day. Her attempt to console me involved saying, "Pft. I bet he doesn't think about you every day" and walking away. Thanks. FML

#20540840
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30082) - you deserved it (5836)

On 03/12/2013 at 2:40pm - love - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)



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