Monday 25 February 2013 
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Today, I filled out an application for a job at Dairy Queen. I handed my application to the manager along with my résumé, and he said he'd be in contact with me. Not even five minutes after I left, a friend who works there sent me a picture of my crumpled-up application in the trash. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27352) - you deserved it (1554)
On 03/01/2013 at 10:52am - work - by anonymous - United States (Oregon)
Today, I was trying to be sexy and change in front of my boyfriend. As I was changing, he started to talk to me about how we should both try and lose weight. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26868) - you deserved it (5343)
On 02/26/2013 at 3:26pm - love - by pooh anne (woman) - United States (Arkansas)
Today, after a long work shift, I was so tired that I took a nap in my car to avoid driving half-asleep. When I awoke, there was a huge truck in front of me. I thought I'd fallen asleep while driving and was about to die. I only realized it was stationary after I pissed myself. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26840) - you deserved it (4680)
On 03/03/2013 at 12:37pm - misc - by FUCKKKS (man) - United States
Today, I told my mom that I heard something, and I think we have rats in the attic and should hire an exterminator. She looked at me and said, "Rats, huh? That's what the mom in The Exorcist thought, but it turned out to be the devil living up there." FML
I agree, your life sucks (26427) - you deserved it (2799)
On 03/02/2013 at 11:18pm - misc - by jkbeynon - United States (California)
Today, while I was studying for an exam, my younger sister came home extremely drunk and threw up all over herself and her bed. I later got grounded for not setting a better example. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26374) - you deserved it (1428)
On 02/28/2013 at 6:02am - misc - by catdog552 - United States
Today, my friends confronted me and told me that they no longer want to visit my house because my dog smells really disgusting. I didn't have the heart to tell them that the smell is actually my parents, who have been trying to "save water" by only showering once a fortnight. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26310) - you deserved it (2326)
On 02/28/2013 at 5:56am - misc - by sickofthesmelltoo (man) - Australia (Victoria)
Today, while at the nail salon, my boyfriend called. Since I was getting my nails done, I had to put him on speaker. The whole salon heard him break up with me. I can still hear their snickering in my head. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26259) - you deserved it (5160)
On 02/25/2013 at 6:04pm - love - by HeatherRosure18 - United States (Illinois)
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because she could not stand the thought of being in a relationship with a man who wears orange. This is the first time I've worn an orange shirt in at least 6 months. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26010) - you deserved it (2101)
Today, my mom tried to convince my dad that I was a lesbian. Why? Because she was bored. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25684) - you deserved it (2912)
On 02/25/2013 at 11:14am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States
Today, I came home from a rough day working two jobs to find a plate of cookies on my desk with a note from my roommates saying, "You deserve it!" I happily broke one in half to eat and discovered they contained coconut. I'm allergic to coconut, a fact both of my roommates are aware of. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25593) - you deserved it (2201)
On 02/25/2013 at 12:44am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Missouri)
Today, I was babysitting, and I had to pee really, really badly. I couldn't figure out how to get the stupid toilet lock off, and ended up pissing myself. As I stood in the bathroom in tears, their child screamed, "No, no, pee-pee in the POTTY!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (25545) - you deserved it (5916)
On 02/25/2013 at 2:16pm - kids - by soaked (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I found out my girlfriend can do Heath Ledger's "Joker" voice perfectly. I'm not sure if I should be scared or impressed. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25539) - you deserved it (5512)
On 03/03/2013 at 11:05am - love - by nerdgirlmickey (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I found out that the man I just married doesn't want to have children. We had this conversation multiple times with no problems before getting married, but now he would "rather die" than have children, because according to him, they would ruin his life. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25401) - you deserved it (3778)
On 03/02/2013 at 1:05am - love - by bummer.. (woman) - United States
Monday 17 June 2013
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