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Saturday 16 February 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I was pushing my wheelchair-bound grandpa back home, when a pretty girl walked past us in the opposite direction. He made me stop and turn him around, just so he could ogle her ass as she walked away. FML

#20518187
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27109) - you deserved it (4492) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 02/22/2013 at 9:27pm - misc - by hé merde - Sent from mobile version

Today, I had to use a dictionary before I realized I was being flirted with. FML

#20506101
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26955) - you deserved it (11355)

On 02/14/2013 at 6:01am - love - by lex - United States

Today, a guy wolf-whistled me as I walked to the shop wearing comfy joggers, no makeup and my hair scraped back. Feeling rather pleased about it, I told my best friend and my fiancé. Their unanimous conclusion: the guy must have been drunk or taking hallucinogenic drugs. FML

Today, after months of a very healthy sex life with my boyfriend, he asked me to let him try anal. I'm dead-set against it, so I tried to let him down easy by jokingly saying that I would, but only if he let me try it on him first. He said, "Sure." Fuck. FML

#20518830
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26951) - you deserved it (45052)

On 02/23/2013 at 1:27pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Denmark (Hovedstaden)

Today, I uploaded a new Facebook profile photo, which got over 20 likes in the space of an hour. The most I've ever gotten before was 10. Surprised, I went to check my picture again, only to notice two guys were sarcastically flipping me the bird in the background. FML

#20514955
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26879) - you deserved it (7598)

On 02/20/2013 at 2:48pm - misc - by club goer - Canada

Today, I had to take my fiancé to the hospital so they could remove a tampon applicator that he claimed he somehow "fell onto". It was lodged up his nostril. I'm marrying this man in a week. FML

#20508531
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26830) - you deserved it (4650)

On 02/15/2013 at 6:22pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Venezuela (Lara)

Today, after spending six months completely repainting and redecorating our new home, I finally finished the last touches and went to remove the masking tape. Off came the tape, along with huge blotches of plasterwork. FML

#20503623
93 comments

Today, I came home to find the dog had learned how to open our stair-gate and kitchen door, devoured the entire fruitcake I'd made for a special occasion, and then vomited said fruitcake all over the fabric sofa. FML

#20503420
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26466) - you deserved it (4038)

On 02/12/2013 at 8:18am - animals - by Stoopiddogbot (woman) - United Kingdom (Swansea)

Today, I've been single for so long my grandmother had to ask if I actually like women or not. FML

#20513781
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26302) - you deserved it (3353)

On 02/19/2013 at 6:07pm - love - by Forever alone Guy - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my mother started cursing at a lady for tooting her horn at her in traffic, because there was "no need for road rage". When I tried to calm her down, she slammed on the brakes and told me to get out and walk. FML

#20509033
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26301) - you deserved it (3437)

On 02/16/2013 at 1:24am - misc - by howannoying - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I was super hungry and went to a Thai restaurant. The waitress left two small bowls of fried rice on the counter, and I thought they were for me. I ate one and a lady came over screaming. Apparently the small cups of rice was part of a religious ceremony. FML

#20503300
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26252) - you deserved it (16823)

On 02/12/2013 at 3:04am - misc - by Thai rice mistake - United States (California)

Today, a cute girl asked if my dog was available for a date on Valentine's Day. Thinking I was in luck, I asked if I should come along. She said no. My dog has better game than I do. FML

#20503854
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26160) - you deserved it (6194)

On 02/12/2013 at 4:50pm - animals - by Doggotmytongue - United States (Illinois)

Today, I found out that my upstairs neighbor has a cat. I was blessed with this knowledge when she threw several piles of used kitty litter and cat poop over her balcony and onto my patio. FML

#20509867
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26076) - you deserved it (1851)

On 02/16/2013 at 7:43pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Finland (Southern Finland)



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