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Thursday 14 February 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I've been single for so long my grandmother had to ask if I actually like women or not. FML

#20513781
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25733) - you deserved it (3296)

On 02/19/2013 at 6:07pm - love - by Forever alone Guy - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I got a new roommate after having a horrible relationship with the previous one. She seemed nice at first, until our first night together. She got completely wasted, spilled beer all over my bed and blew chunks into my fish tank. FML

#20513351
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25726) - you deserved it (2391)

On 02/19/2013 at 10:46am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I unknowingly bought a house next to a former toxic waste dump. I found out by reading an article in the paper where residents are claiming that they are experiencing cancer and birth defects. FML

#20503049
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25623) - you deserved it (6008)

On 02/11/2013 at 11:18pm - health - by toxic waste - United States (New York)

Today, the guy I like asked me out for the first time. It's a good thing he did it over Facebook, because I started shaking and almost threw up. I don't know how I'm going to function on our date next week. FML

#20514506
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25429) - you deserved it (6854)

On 02/20/2013 at 2:31am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I got locked out of my car for an hour in frigid weather at a busy gas station. Every time I tried to use the key, the alarm went off and the locks wouldn't work. The car company claims they've never heard of this happening. I just bought it last week after taking out a 5 year loan. FML

#20513495
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25339) - you deserved it (2277)

On 02/19/2013 at 1:47pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my girlfriend bought herself a brand new iPad and iPod Touch, and returned my aging iPod and Kindle, which she constantly steals for her own use. She considers it my Valentine's Day present. FML

#20506625
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25227) - you deserved it (3078)

On 02/14/2013 at 3:23pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - Germany

Today, my mother started cursing at a lady for tooting her horn at her in traffic, because there was "no need for road rage". When I tried to calm her down, she slammed on the brakes and told me to get out and walk. FML

#20509033
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25055) - you deserved it (3290)

On 02/16/2013 at 1:24am - misc - by howannoying - Australia (Victoria)

Today, for the second time in two months, the person in the bathroom stall next to me commented on how loud I pee. This time, she made racehorse noises. I'm now too self-conscious to pee in public again. FML

#20503939
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24892) - you deserved it (2595)

On 02/12/2013 at 5:58pm - misc - by likearacehorse (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I purchased a box of girl scout cookies from a coworker. I wanted to save them for later at home, so I placed them on my desk and then headed to a meeting. When I returned, there was an empty box sitting there with a post-it note saying, "Thanks!" Nobody will own up to it. FML

#20512675
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24815) - you deserved it (5687)

On 02/18/2013 at 8:49pm - work - by erockinthesuburb (man) - United States

Today, I had to take my fiancé to the hospital so they could remove a tampon applicator that he claimed he somehow "fell onto". It was lodged up his nostril. I'm marrying this man in a week. FML

#20508531
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24783) - you deserved it (4422)

On 02/15/2013 at 6:22pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Venezuela (Lara)

Today, I was terribly late for class, so I rushed to the classroom door, thinking it was unlocked. I smacked face-first into the glass, and awkwardly fell to the floor. Once I got back up, I peeked through the glass, only to realise it wasn't even my class. FML

#20505090
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24745) - you deserved it (7422)

On 02/13/2013 at 3:31pm - misc - by nosebleeder - Sweden

Today, my girlfriend and I both developed food poisoning from last night's sushi. Our apartment has one bathroom. FML

#20503655
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24694) - you deserved it (2636)

On 02/12/2013 at 1:43pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States



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