Wednesday 30 January 2013 
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Today, I went for a checkup after having recently been fitted with dental implants. The oral surgeon I chose was supposedly the best in the area, but it turns out that he inserted the implants at the wrong angle. Now I have to have further surgery to correct it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21209) - you deserved it (1938)
On 01/31/2013 at 4:29pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)
Today, as I was walking to my car, I noticed a car with a tail light out. Trying to be a good citizen, I walked up to the driver's side door and said "excuse me". The lady then maced me through the open window. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21156) - you deserved it (2135)
On 02/05/2013 at 12:45pm - health - by maced face - United States
Today, my mum came to my ballet class. She spent the whole lesson sitting at the back yelling at me to "stop sticking your butt out". My ballet instructor had to ask her several times to pipe down. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21073) - you deserved it (1268)
On 02/06/2013 at 1:57pm - misc - by embarassinggg (woman) - United Kingdom (East Sussex)
Today, my pants ripped while I was at work. I had to keep my balls to the wall while I dodged customers and edged ever closer to the break room. Before I could call my wife and ask her to bring a new pair, my boss burst in, got pissed, and made me go back out and deal with irate customers. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21058) - you deserved it (1718)
On 01/31/2013 at 3:27pm - work - by fuckit (man) - Italy (Lazio)
Today, working as a nurse, I saw a patient in for follow-up after a partial leg amputation. I checked her blood pressure and gave her the reading, which prompted her husband to ask what it meant. She replied, "I'm alive." Before I could stop myself, "And kicking" spilled out of my mouth. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21013) - you deserved it (7561)
On 02/04/2013 at 10:30pm - health - by facepalm - United States (New Jersey)
Today, I ran into a former co-worker who I hadn't seen in years. She was raving at how I hadn't aged a bit, but before I could thank her she said, "But, you know, chubby people age better." FML
I agree, your life sucks (20934) - you deserved it (2191)
On 02/04/2013 at 7:17am - work - by Colleen Nichols - United States (New Jersey)
Today, I spun off the road and into a ditch. The insurance company told me I'd have to wait an hour, as they had other cars to tow first. I had to pee so badly that I resorted to using the only thing I had in my car: a plastic bag. That's when I got a knock on my window from the tow truck driver. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20916) - you deserved it (3843)
On 02/02/2013 at 1:57am - misc - by merp. (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)
Today, I decided at age 18 that it's time to put into storage the picture books that have been collecting dust in my room for nearly a decade. My mother took this as a sign that I'm planning to move out and abandon her forever, and has been crying for the last four hours. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20789) - you deserved it (1548)
On 02/02/2013 at 7:52pm - kids - by NeverEscaping (man) - Canada (Alberta)
Today, I received a birthday present from a friend. It was the very same gift I gave to her for Christmas. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20769) - you deserved it (2899)
On 01/28/2013 at 12:24pm - misc - by thrifty gone wrong - United States (California)
Today, I was trying on some shoes. As I was bending down, an old lady with a walking frame slowly approached. As she got close she whispered to me "Mmm, you've got a nice tushie." My girlfriend will not let me hear the end of it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20737) - you deserved it (2239)
On 01/28/2013 at 3:14am - misc - by Creeped out (man) - New Zealand (Auckland)
Today, my mother "checked in" to rehab on Facebook. The same rehab that told her to hand over her smartphone. The dumbass was smart enough to steal my phone and dumb enough to get it confiscated. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20688) - you deserved it (1682)
On 01/29/2013 at 10:18pm - health - by motherless - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, I was partnered up with a girl in my art class, since the teacher had asked us to take turns drawing portraits of each other. I went first and felt pretty proud of how the drawing turned out. I showed it to her and she said "That's OK. I'm not good at drawing either." FML
I agree, your life sucks (19881) - you deserved it (1694)
On 02/05/2013 at 8:09am - work - by picasso - United States
Today, I was washing the dishes at work. I had to pee really bad but first I wanted to finish the dishes. A coworker jumped out from behind the ice machine. I screamed like a girl and pissed my pants. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19726) - you deserved it (3580)
On 02/03/2013 at 10:50pm - work - by klovemachine (man) - United States
Monday 17 June 2013
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