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Saturday 26 January 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I made a new friend: the cricket the doctor pulled out of my ear canal. FML

#20479072
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24149) - you deserved it (1858)

On 01/26/2013 at 12:53am - animals - by Ear Invasion - United States (New Mexico)

Today, I went shopping first thing in the morning to avoid the crowd. Having recently had surgery on my knee, I used an electric scooter to shop. The scooter died in the middle of the store. No one was around to help me. FML

#20480640
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24036) - you deserved it (3045)

On 01/27/2013 at 12:23am - health - by crippled shopper - United States (Illinois)

Today, my husband quit his stable job of 12 years at the bank to pursue a career selling kites. If we don't end up homeless because of this, god knows we will when he has a real mid-life crisis. FML

#20480052
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23839) - you deserved it (2306)

On 01/26/2013 at 5:20pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Denmark (Syddanmark)

Today, most of my neighbours came to my house in an angry mob to complain about my dog barking. I don't have a dog. FML

#20488553
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23762) - you deserved it (1622)

On 02/01/2013 at 1:09am - animals - by Angry Mob - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, someone put a whole packet of glitter on the blades of my ceiling fan. Too bad I only noticed when I turned it on. FML

#20482822
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23752) - you deserved it (2454)

On 01/28/2013 at 8:55am - misc - by hopelessteej (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, it's been two days since my upstairs neighbour's toilet started flooding both our apartments. I have to go to the bathroom with an umbrella. FML

#20471583
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23701) - you deserved it (1575) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/21/2013 at 3:24pm - misc - by normal - France (Midi-Pyrenees)

Today, I was driving my 9 month pregnant sister around in our golf cart and it died. I had to push it the rest of the way home. She wouldn't stop faking going into labor. FML

#20477938
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23683) - you deserved it (3004)

On 01/25/2013 at 10:49am - misc - by really?!? - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I took a taxi ride with my friends. As we were getting out, I paid the taxi driver. With a grin, he drove away fast. It turns out my friend had already paid. FML

#20475292
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23659) - you deserved it (6116)

On 01/23/2013 at 6:33pm - money - by stevenr579 (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I went to the grocery store with my boyfriend. I wasn't feeling well so I wasn't paying too much attention to his usual antics. Since he thought I was ignoring him, he decided to grab me roughly by the stomach to give me a hug. I ended up puking right in the middle of the aisle. FML

#20484554
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23585) - you deserved it (1922)

On 01/29/2013 at 9:51am - health - by oh no (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I actually considered my boyfriend romantic and deserving of an award when he didn't fart after sex. FML

#20488602
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23487) - you deserved it (3685)

On 02/01/2013 at 2:01am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was hanging out with my new boyfriend, and he took me back to his house for the first time. Taped to his bedroom door was a sheet of paper emblazoned with the words: "THE RAPE DUNGEON". I feel safer already. FML

#20478132
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23465) - you deserved it (3235)

On 01/25/2013 at 1:51pm - love - by vagina dentata for christmas, pls (woman) - United States

Today, I have to take a midterm, which is worth a large part of my grade. All our teacher has taught us so far is how to roast s'mores over a Bunsen burner, and how to make gummy bears explode. Our test is on kinetics. FML

#20471562
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23416) - you deserved it (2262)

On 01/21/2013 at 4:26pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I had to suffer through a two-hour long trivia game with my boyfriend's family. As if that wasn't annoying enough, my boyfriend caused the pair of us to lose by just a single point, because he answered "Quebec" to the question of "What is the capital city of France?" FML

#20480093
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23412) - you deserved it (5054)

On 01/26/2013 at 5:57pm - misc - by twohoursclosertodeath (woman) - United States (Texas)



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Wednesday 15 May 2013

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