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Tuesday 22 January 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, my husband yelled at me for not doing any household chores. I can barely move my hand without suffering excruciating pain, due to recent surgery to ease my arthritis, and my other hand is as bad as ever. I can barely work this phone, let alone wash dishes and iron clothes. FML

#20476416
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28767) - you deserved it (5771)

On 01/24/2013 at 12:52pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, during a date, I discovered that if I cough with my mouth closed, snot will spray from my nose all over the place like some kind of mucus cannon. FML

#20484952
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28755) - you deserved it (6281)

On 01/29/2013 at 4:23pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (North Carolina)

Today, it's been two days since my upstairs neighbour's toilet started flooding both our apartments. I have to go to the bathroom with an umbrella. FML

#20471583
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28615) - you deserved it (2315) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/21/2013 at 3:24pm - misc - by normal - France (Midi-Pyrenees)

Today, I took a taxi ride with my friends. As we were getting out, I paid the taxi driver. With a grin, he drove away fast. It turns out my friend had already paid. FML

#20475292
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28530) - you deserved it (6825)

On 01/23/2013 at 6:33pm - money - by stevenr579 (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I had to suffer through a two-hour long trivia game with my boyfriend's family. As if that wasn't annoying enough, my boyfriend caused the pair of us to lose by just a single point, because he answered "Quebec" to the question of "What is the capital city of France?" FML

#20480093
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28284) - you deserved it (6517)

On 01/26/2013 at 5:57pm - misc - by twohoursclosertodeath (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I met with my Bolivian friend, who's vacationing here for a few weeks. Eager to show him how welcoming we are in the USA, I took him home and introduced him to my parents. The first words out of my dad's mouth were, "Bolivia? That's in Europe, right? We saved your asses in World War 2." FML

#20477083
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28242) - you deserved it (3513)

On 01/24/2013 at 8:13pm - misc - by oh ffs (man) - United States

Today, at my 6-year-old son's birthday party, I had to explain to my boyfriend that it's not okay to use condoms as party balloons. FML

#20477498
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28032) - you deserved it (5749)

On 01/25/2013 at 12:39am - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my boss put me on suspension for violating company policy by having non-work related mail in my inbox. They were spam emails. FML

#20478634
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27840) - you deserved it (1898)

On 01/25/2013 at 8:04pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, at work at a car dealership, a seemingly overzealous customer shook my hand vigorously after we finalized a deal. I didn't think anything of it until a coworker pointed out that he was just trying to make my breasts jiggle. I'm a man. FML

#20473605
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27646) - you deserved it (5647)

On 01/22/2013 at 7:29pm - work - by milkshake - United States (Texas)

Today, while reading in the bath, I accidentally switched the shower on. Not wanting my book to get soaked, I threw it out of the tub. When I got out of the tub later, I found it had landed squarely in the toilet. FML

#20479000
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27261) - you deserved it (11328)

On 01/26/2013 at 12:03am - misc - by stelssy (woman) - United States

Today, I had to have major oral surgery. Needless to say I am in need of some heavy pain medication. My pharmacist insists that my surgeon never called in my medicine, and my surgeon insists otherwise. This has been going back and forth for hours. FML

#20483291
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27065) - you deserved it (1820)

On 01/28/2013 at 4:18pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Alabama)

Today, at my cousin's birthday party, my grandma took me to one side, slipped me a pad, and started ranting that tampons "steal your virginity" and that I should never use them. Well, okay then. FML

#20481357
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27042) - you deserved it (2066)

On 01/27/2013 at 2:08pm - misc - by dynah114 (woman) - Israel (HaMerkaz)

Today, I found out my ten year old brother and his best friend have taught our new parrot to say, "Shut up, bitch." We have a bunch of our extended family coming over tomorrow to see what the parrot can say. FML

#20473087
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26999) - you deserved it (3615)

On 01/22/2013 at 2:00pm - animals - by What? - Australia



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