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Friday 18 January 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, mah husband sent me a text before heading home from work. All it said was, ( Ned a fuck. Backd up to hell. You're about to shower face first in a fire hydrant. ) Love u too, hun.

#20466497
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31443) - you deserved it (5389)

On 01/18/2013 at 3:59pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Yesterday , I caught mah 4 year old son yet again trying to drink out of the toilet. FML

#20472782
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31351) - you deserved it (5056)

On 01/22/2013 at 6:39am - kids - by dani0810 - Canada (Ontario)

Today... I introducd mah girlfriend to mah parents. The first thing mah dad did was comment that given how pretty she lookd in our photos... and compard to how she looks in real life... she's amazing at using Photoshop. FML

#20466661
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31266) - you deserved it (3288)

On 01/18/2013 at 6:03pm - love - by dpap - United States (Iowa)

Today, mah school's theatre decided to produce Les Misérables. I got the part of Éponine. My boyfriend, being a talented performer, could have gotten any part he wanted. However, he only wanted to play the soldier responsible for killing Éponine. FML

#20474800
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31167) - you deserved it (5172)

On 01/23/2013 at 1:03pm - love - by Anonymous - United States

Today , I was babysitting , and a little grl askd for help with her homework. I cheerfully began an explanation , only to freeze mid-sentence. I could not for the life of me remember how to do long-division. I'm about to graduate from Cornell University , and her little brother had to correct me. FML

#20459773
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31090) - you deserved it (9487)

On 01/14/2013 at 9:52pm - kids - by IvyLeague? - United States (New York)

TODAY, MONTHS INTO SUPPORTING MY MUM WITH HER PART TIME CLEANING JOB BY COOKING DINNER FIR MY LARGE FAMILY AFTER UNIVERSITY, I FOUND OUT THAT SHE DOESN'T ACTUALLY HAVE A JOB, SHE JUST LEAVES THE HOUSE FIR A FEW HOURS BECAUSE SHE DOESN'T WANT TO COOK DINNER. FML

#20470602
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31079) - you deserved it (2384)

On 01/21/2013 at 1:03am - work - by CollegeChef (woman) - Australia

Today... I was having a conversation with mah mother during which I describd something as being pungent. She thought I had made up the word... so I grabbd the dictionary to show her that I hadn't. She then became enragd... threw the dictionary at mah head and told me never to talk to her again. FML

#20463921
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31030) - you deserved it (3227)

On 01/17/2013 at 1:38am - misc - by Mizzaroo - United States (Washington)

Yesterday, the drummer of band briefly mentioned something about not being allowed into the United States, just as he left our last practice before our big tour in America!! FML

Today, after working the midnight shift at job, I thought it would be nice to leave a sweet love note along with boyfriend's favourite candy in his car. Upon finding it, he immediately broke up with me for "breaking into" his car. FML

#20460414
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30791) - you deserved it (4737)

On 01/15/2013 at 7:14am - love - by Anonymous - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I made my first snowman ever, an ten crieden my big broter kicked it to pieces !! I'm 27 !! FML

#20475358
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30723) - you deserved it (9471)

On 01/23/2013 at 7:17pm - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Kent)

TODAY I WALKED UP SIXTEEN FLIGHTS OF STARS TO MY ROOM TO AVOID THE LIFT LINES. WHEN I WAS ALMOST TO THE TOP, THE FRE ALARM SOUNDED. FML

#20462640
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30717) - you deserved it (3410)

On 01/16/2013 at 2:02pm - misc - by tired - United States (Massachusetts)

Taday While Moving Into Mah New Place , I Saw Mah New , Elderly Neighbor Sitting On Her Porch. I Cheerfully Greeted Her With , "Hello , How Are You?" She Simply Rocked Slowly In Her Chair And Replied , "Just Waiting To Die." She Was The Most Cheerful Person I Met All Day. FML

TODAY, THE LEAD SINGER OF THE BAND I RECENTLY JOIND BLATANTLY ADMITTD TO A FAN THAT THE ONLY REASON HE LET ME IN WAS CUZ I'M "SO FUCKIN' UGLY" THAT I MAKE THE REST OF THEM LOOK "TEN TIMES BETTER" IN COMPARISON. FML

#20464662
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30654) - you deserved it (2629)

On 01/17/2013 at 3:50pm - misc - by sad drummer (man) - United States (California)



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