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Wednesday 16 January 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, while moving into my new place, I saw my new, elderly neighbor sitting on her porch. I cheerfully greeted her with, "Hello, how are you?" She simply rocked slowly in her chair and replied, "Just waiting to die." She was the most cheerful person I met all day. FML

Today, the lead singer of the band I recently joined blatantly admitted to a fan that the only reason he let me in was because I'm "so fuckin' ugly" that I make the rest of them look "ten times better" in comparison. FML

#20464662
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30548) - you deserved it (2619)

On 01/17/2013 at 3:50pm - misc - by sad drummer (man) - United States (California)

Today, when I asked my boss why my bonus was cut in half, he replied, "I have no idea what you really do." I'm the IT Manager. FML

#20465650
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30322) - you deserved it (2562)

On 01/18/2013 at 12:53am - money - by Anon - United States (Texas)

Today, I finally got to conduct my first questioning of a suspect, who had been arrested in connection with a car theft. As I recited the Miranda warning to him, my mind went totally blank, and after a few seconds, he sarcastically continued the speech for me. FML

#20464395
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30235) - you deserved it (14524)

On 01/17/2013 at 12:15pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I caught my 4 year old son yet again trying to drink out of the toilet. FML

#20472782
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30208) - you deserved it (4930)

On 01/22/2013 at 6:39am - kids - by dani0810 - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was cleaning at work when an elderly gentleman walked towards me, paused, and with a wink said, "That's what I like to see: a girl on her knees." This is the same workplace where another old man informed me that my yellow uniform made me look like a "suggestive cheesecake." FML

#20472773
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29966) - you deserved it (2611)

On 01/22/2013 at 6:14am - work - by Job Seeking (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I walked up sixteen flights of stairs to my room to avoid the lift lines. When I was almost to the top, the fire alarm sounded. FML

#20462640
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29802) - you deserved it (3330)

On 01/16/2013 at 2:02pm - misc - by tired - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, after getting into an argument with my dad, he told me that I would make a great ex wife one day. FML

#20467602
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29798) - you deserved it (6730)

On 01/19/2013 at 8:51am - love - by Claire - United States (Maryland)

Today, I woke up following one of the worst nightmares of my life. I was sweating, clutching the sheets, and feeling sick to the stomach. I'd been dreaming of my wedding that's taking place next week. FML

#20468290
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29771) - you deserved it (6504)

On 01/19/2013 at 6:35pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Somerset)

Today, I was babysitting, and a little girl asked for help with her homework. I cheerfully began an explanation, only to freeze mid-sentence. I could not for the life of me remember how to do long-division. I'm about to graduate from Cornell University, and her little brother had to correct me. FML

#20459773
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29755) - you deserved it (9265)

On 01/14/2013 at 9:52pm - kids - by IvyLeague? - United States (New York)

Today, I took a taxi ride with my friends. As we were getting out, I paid the taxi driver. With a grin, he drove away fast. It turns out my friend had already paid. FML

#20475292
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29591) - you deserved it (6968)

On 01/23/2013 at 6:33pm - money - by stevenr579 (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I went and bought lunch for all the people I work with. The only meal the place forgot was mine. FML

#20473074
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29288) - you deserved it (2889)

On 01/22/2013 at 1:49pm - work - by me - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I have to take a midterm, which is worth a large part of my grade. All our teacher has taught us so far is how to roast s'mores over a Bunsen burner, and how to make gummy bears explode. Our test is on kinetics. FML

#20471562
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29044) - you deserved it (3371)

On 01/21/2013 at 4:26pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)



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