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Tuesday 15 January 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, the lead singer of the band I recently joined blatantly admitted to a fan that the only reason he let me in was because I'm "so fuckin' ugly" that I make the rest of them look "ten times better" in comparison. FML

#20464662
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28843) - you deserved it (2484)

On 01/17/2013 at 3:50pm - misc - by sad drummer (man) - United States (California)

Today, I caught my 4 year old son yet again trying to drink out of the toilet. FML

#20472782
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28643) - you deserved it (4743)

On 01/22/2013 at 6:39am - kids - by dani0810 - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was the last person in line for going on the bus. Incidentally, I was right behind a guy way taller and wider than me. When he got on the bus, the bus driver immediately shut the door behind him. I was left outside chasing after the bus. FML

#20462065
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28610) - you deserved it (1868)

On 01/16/2013 at 1:42am - misc - by Anonymous -

Today, I was babysitting, and a little girl asked for help with her homework. I cheerfully began an explanation, only to freeze mid-sentence. I could not for the life of me remember how to do long-division. I'm about to graduate from Cornell University, and her little brother had to correct me. FML

#20459773
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28463) - you deserved it (9000)

On 01/14/2013 at 9:52pm - kids - by IvyLeague? - United States (New York)

Today, I have to take a midterm, which is worth a large part of my grade. All our teacher has taught us so far is how to roast s'mores over a Bunsen burner, and how to make gummy bears explode. Our test is on kinetics. FML

#20471562
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28345) - you deserved it (3306)

On 01/21/2013 at 4:26pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, my dad was making drinks for my mom and himself, so I asked him to make me some coffee too. When he brought me my drink, I took a sip, and realized he'd poured salt in it. As I gagged, he muttered, "Next time, make it yourself." FML

#20469761
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28298) - you deserved it (7269)

On 01/20/2013 at 4:36pm - misc - by megean c.l. (woman) - United States

Today, I went and bought lunch for all the people I work with. The only meal the place forgot was mine. FML

#20473074
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28175) - you deserved it (2806)

On 01/22/2013 at 1:49pm - work - by me - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, it's been two days since my upstairs neighbour's toilet started flooding both our apartments. I have to go to the bathroom with an umbrella. FML

#20471583
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27839) - you deserved it (2260) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/21/2013 at 3:24pm - misc - by normal - France (Midi-Pyrenees)

Today, our company's owner's son took over. The first thing he did? Fire me. Why? He said my sales are down. I work in Public Relations. FML

#20463186
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27534) - you deserved it (1544)

On 01/16/2013 at 7:35pm - work - by itsjustwill - United States (Washington)

Today, I went on a run with my crush. She expressed how happy she was to have a decent running partner, because the last one kept complaining he thought he might throw up. We got to the top of the hill and I puked right in front of her. FML

#20463224
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27037) - you deserved it (2973)

On 01/16/2013 at 7:53pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (Hawaii)

Today, an elderly gentleman came into my store complaining of a toothache, so I showed him where the Orajel was located. He then insisted on making a big scene, claiming that I really had the magic touch and if I would just stroke his cheek all his pain would go away. FML

#20464379
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27014) - you deserved it (2551)

On 01/17/2013 at 11:57am - work - by lifebecrazed (woman) -

Today, someone broke into my car by smashing the driver's side window. I'd be less irritated if they had just used the door handle; the lock has been broken for years. FML

#20467580
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26824) - you deserved it (2910)

On 01/19/2013 at 8:14am - money - by Perplexed - United States (South Dakota)

Today, I realised in the middle of my shift how useless my deodorant is in the stifling heatwave spreading through my country. It's no longer effective against my awful B.O., which is a problem because I'm a mascot, and my costume traps the smell inside like a portable toilet. FML

#20469816
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26687) - you deserved it (4300)

On 01/20/2013 at 5:13pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - Australia



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