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Wednesday 9 January 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, my 8-year-old sister matter-of-factly said that she's going to get married before me if I don't stop wearing track pants. FML

#20462592
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12345) - you deserved it (23739)

On 01/16/2013 at 1:28pm - misc - by Kendra_Nine (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I got a new girlfriend. Unfortunately, the last girl I asked out just responded to my relationship request on Facebook. It's been 4 hours, and my new girlfriend already thinks I'm cheating on her. FML

#20460941
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10522) - you deserved it (30389)

On 01/15/2013 at 3:53pm - love - by George - United States (Washington)

Today, I was walking out of my girlfriend's house with her when I saw her thong drying on the rack. I picked it up, sniffed it and put it on my face as a joke. She replied with, "Those are my mother's." FML

#20461976
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10076) - you deserved it (35463)

On 01/16/2013 at 12:52am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, at work, a little girl came in and asked if we had any dance clothes. As I showed her, I asked if she was in a competition. When she said yes, I crossed my fingers and told her I hoped she would win. Unfortunately, I didn't cross them properly and I accidentally gave her the finger. FML

#20449665
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9523) - you deserved it (25998)

On 01/09/2013 at 5:42am - work - by georgiamarshall_ - Australia (New South Wales)

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I got genuinely annoyed at myself when I realised I probably lack the skills to survive a Zombie apocalypse. FML

#20449927
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9476) - you deserved it (20483)

On 01/09/2013 at 11:42am - misc - by drake86 - United Kingdom (Argyll and Bute)

Today, in an elaborate plan to finally meet my cute neighbor, I convinced my friendly mailman to switch up our mail so I'd have an excuse to meet her. After I delivered her mail, I waited for her to mention that she had my mail, but she never did. I even saw her take it out of her mail box. FML

#20446490
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8307) - you deserved it (22282)

On 01/07/2013 at 4:39pm - love - by james88 (man) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, during an hour-long drive, my sister told me she's lost her "faith in humanity", because one of her friends bought his 8-year-old son an iPad. She uses this stupid expression all the time, and I got so pissed off that I forgot to brake at a red light, rear-ending the car in front of us. FML

#20454301
200 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8041) - you deserved it (34669)

On 01/11/2013 at 9:16pm - misc - by lostmyfaithinblowjobs (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I was laughing at a girl who really sucks at badminton. Turns out she has anger issues, and a really good aim when she's mad. I've never been hit so hard in the crotch before. FML

#20450098
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7545) - you deserved it (43800)

On 01/09/2013 at 2:27pm - misc - by Anon - United States (Connecticut)



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